Photo from PostConsumers
New years resolutions are overrated and frankly I don't even read articles about them anymore. Still, I'm sure there are a lot of things about ourselves we'd like for us to change, and writing them down and trying to do something about them isn't exactly a wicked thing to do.
I don't exactly have a list in mind, but there are a few things I'd like to talk about in this article. If anyone is thinking of what to change within them, one should probably include trying to become a better speaker. Now I'm not talking about being mindful of your enunciation or phrasing, or grammar, although that's not particularly a bad thing either. What I'm saying is, I think it's time people invest in getting their thoughts across in an authentic and sincere manner. Tell people what you want them to know, make it clear, and mean what you say. Standing up for yourself is one thing, but being mature and gutsy enough to engage in thought-provoking conversations is another.
Because of the digital era, not too many people take the time to settle their differences with others on a one-on-one basis. People fight through Facebook posts and twitter wars. The lines are blurry and the signals are lost.
If you want to tell someone something, tell him or her. Make sure he or she understands what you want to say. If you think about it, communication isn't that hard. Life is too short to be hiding in the shadows of your fears. We are a country blessed with hundreds, if not thousands, of languages. Let's learn to use our words wisely and intellectually.
Let's be blunt with appreciation and tactful with our rebukes. Compliment others when they deserve it. Be generous with good things to say, and be brave when it come to telling someone things they might not find music in their ears.
Photo from Njeri
Talk to your friends. Put down your phones, and genuinely talk to them. Look them in the eyes and talk to them about your day, or a book you just read, or a movie you just saw or what your thoughts are on a current event, and ask them what their thoughts are too.
Don't be afraid to talk. But talk with sense. Be inquisitive. Ask other people what they think and what they believe in. Don't be conceited. Some people talk about themselves too much, it's disgusting. Learn to find the balance.
Admire, respect, correct, and agree--all in the name of diplomatic conversing. And while we're at it, it wouldn't hurt if we tried to be at least less sensitive. We are arguably one of the most sensitive breeds on earth, and I think if each one of us at least tried thinking outside of our comfort zones and tried seeing things the way other people do, then we wouldn't be that much of whiners, let alone easily hurt.
Communication is a powerful tool and if we just try hard enough to find the balance between being blunt and tactful and being sensitive and careful, we might actually have a shot at being better speakers.
On the other hand, it is also occasionally wise to detach ourselves from others and just be on our own. If you think you can build a strong personality around others, wait until you become a strong person on your own. Another thing I'd like to encourage others to do for the coming year is to not be afraid to travel alone. This is something many of you have probably heard of or read about, but when was the last time you actually considered it?
It surprises me how many people cannot, even for just one second, stand the idea of being alone. I'm not even going to talk about how being lonely is different from being alone, because these are obviously two different things. I have had friends who are downright "afraid" to eat in fastfood chains and go inside shopping boutiques simply because they do not have a companion.
One of the reasons so many of us feel incomplete and "un-alive" at the end of the day is simply because we are not comfortable with who we are when we are alone. Much of ourselves is owed to the fact that we are but pieces of other people glued to each other to make up a soul. That should not be the case. You are a soul, and a force to be reckoned with on your own.
You are veins, and bones, and blood, and organs, and a heart put together. Yes, God has designed us to reach out to one another, but we can never say we have become our own person until we make it on our own.
Travelling alone grants you that realization. Being on your own in a place you've never been to gives you the liberty and the freedom you so very deserve. At least once in a while. You will not have to depend on the energy or the interest of others every time you want to try out something new.
Yes there are factors to be considered such as budget and safety. But these are things all of us can work on. For your finances, you can start saving up now. As for security, you can always search for the cellphone number of the police department nearby (Maybe even search and save the numbers of local government units around the area). Updating your friends and family through mobile texting isn't such a bad idea either.
Don't be afraid to travel alone. Chances are, you might not get to do that anymore as you age even more.
Don't get me wrong, I am not a loner, nor am I an introvert or anti-social. In fact, I would jump at the opportunity of getting to travel with friends. But there will always be something special about going on a vacation alone.
2014 has taught me that and while I plan on making several out-of-town trips with friends this year, I still plan on travelling alone again. (Shoutout to my dad who funded my solo-trip to Boracay for my 22nd birthday! Hi, dy!)
You will never know how strong, and witty, and adventurous you are until you are on your own in a distant place.
So save up to wander. Whether it be a local trip to Alcoy or Moalboal or a quick getaway to Baguio or Puerto Galera.
2015 was a year filled with adventures. It's been more than six months now since the job I very much enjoy doing has brought me to the beautiful island of Mindanao. Ever since I started training in this lovely place, I've also been able to sprawl in a web of adventures and post-summer frolicking--and that alone is an achievement to me!
2016 is a year we are yet to spend and create memories on, and if ever there is a wish in my heart for myself and for everyone else to be better at, it is this: for us to learn to speak from the heart and to be brave and adventurous people. We can have a long list of things we want to change about ourselves, but if we focus most of our energy on just one or two things first, we might finally push through with an actual "new year's resolution" despite how mainstream (and impossible) it is.
Let 2016 be as beautiful and as smart as you want it to be!
Bjorn Tabanera
Contributor - Lifestyle
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