Ask me any question about relationships

[Soul Doctor]

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question...

nagkalabuan mi sa ako yabz lately.. but we were able to patch things out but then suddenly... nawad.an napod xa ug gana makigkita or to spend time with me.. what happened was my parents arrived here in cebu.. ginataguan nako xa sa ako family coz of other reasons.. dugay naxa cge ask na unta maging open na xa sa ako family and cge ko ingon soon just give me time..

karon mao ni nahitabo. cge na xa ug likay nako, not sure ug nalain xa when i told her dat she cant come over sa apartment coz my parents are around.. i kept asking na magkita mi sa mall or somewhere else but deadma ko niya.. daghan rason then i found out nagcge xa ug disco lately with her friends...

then ngwork mn ko ala xa pakita for 3 days. nagcge xa disco.. inom.. hantud naa xa na mit lain... then the next day nagkita napod sila adto and that someone kiss her while dancing sa disco and wala niya pugnge... or nidili sa tao . ggusto daw niya to.... after 2 days i tried to contact her and ingon xa the reason why naglikay xa was because ngkamali xa... now my friend texted her.. asking here whats the reason why nagkalabuan napod mi...

ingon xa sa ako friend gkapoi na daw xa sa situation namo na patago.. insulto daw sa iya part.. i told my yabz na we'd go on separate ways na coz i was hurt sa iya ghimo.. now my friend told me i should have tried to tell me parents about her.. but then am confuse coz of what she has done..my point is, nistorya nalang unta xa nako na nalain xa rather ignoring me dba? but ingon ako friend nagrebelde daw xa coz disappointed daw ako yabz coz maskn moingon xa, wala lang daw ghapon koy himuon.

i admit am partly to be blamed.. but ngana jud? ingon ako yabz nahan daw xa adtung na mit niya... libog ko.. i dont know ug unsa sakto himuon.

is it worth the try to tell my mom after what happened? should i make a move to introduce her after what she has done? am thinking man gud na maybe gkaboangan rako niya and she just used that an excuse.. or did that really happen coz she was tired sa amo situation na nahiubos xa? coz before pa niabot ako parents medyo cold xa lately after me naging ok... am not sure so sure what to do.. i need to decide na coz molarga na ako mom...

advice naman....

You should not waste your time on girls like that.

When you want to have a girlfriend the first thing you have to do is
imagine her as your wife.

In this case,
your wife and you had a misunderstanding,
then your wife goes out
and goes with other guys
and even kissed him?

Not the character you would want for a wife.
But, its your heart we are talking about so how do I know.
Basta for me, I'll forget her.
Maraming babae dyan na may values naman.

[Soul Doctor]

doc what is your definition of love?

There are many kinds of love.
Romantic love.
Parental love.
And its easier to google them for their meaning or definitions.

For me Real Love is non judgmental,
it respects the person he/she loves
and is honest, trustworthy and faithful.

[haiasi]

There are many kinds of love.
Romantic love.
Parental love.
And its easier to google them for their meaning or definitions.

For me Real Love is non judgmental,
it respects the person he/she loves
and is honest, trustworthy and faithful.

i mean romantic love....


from your definition doc, are same s3x relationships considered love?
how about third party relationships?

[azeroth]

doc just need your opinion and advice...
am in a bad relationship ryt now....i have ds friend na nahimu nko na confidant...we txt as in everyday, we talk for more than an hour sa fon...naanad npud ko nga katxt xa primi...the way she texted mka feel ko nga grabeh jud iya care nko...one time ngjoke ko nya nga ayaw plabi k basin ma inluv ko nya....ingn xa impossible daw...(which is partly true) ....dli pud ko mag assume na naa xa gusto nko...but one time nagkyog mi...while walking ako xa g.akbayan as if gf nko xa...wla xa moreklamo...then while naa mi sa jeep nag akbay ko nya just like inakbayan sa manag.uyab wla pud xa mreklamo...mas npadoul hinoun xa nko ug mau...nglibog ko..if ds girl like me or cguro she knows nga i was in a bad relationship ryt now mao ingn ana iya pag comfort nko...or gnahan pud xa nko...sa ako part nhadlok pud ko coz naa pa japun sa ako mind ug heart ako previous gf...nd i begin to miss and like ds girl...dli pud ko gusto mawala xa nko...nglibog jud ko....

[Soul Doctor]

doc just need your opinion and advice...
am in a bad relationship ryt now....i have ds friend na nahimu nko na confidant...we txt as in everyday, we talk for more than an hour sa fon...naanad npud ko nga katxt xa primi...the way she texted mka feel ko nga grabeh jud iya care nko...one time ngjoke ko nya nga ayaw plabi k basin ma inluv ko nya....ingn xa impossible daw...(which is partly true) ....dli pud ko mag assume na naa xa gusto nko...but one time nagkyog mi...while walking ako xa g.akbayan as if gf nko xa...wla xa moreklamo...then while naa mi sa jeep nag akbay ko nya just like inakbayan sa manag.uyab wla pud xa mreklamo...mas npadoul hinoun xa nko ug mau...nglibog ko..if ds girl like me or cguro she knows nga i was in a bad relationship ryt now mao ingn ana iya pag comfort nko...or gnahan pud xa nko...sa ako part nhadlok pud ko coz naa pa japun sa ako mind ug heart ako previous gf...nd i begin to miss and like ds girl...dli pud ko gusto mawala xa nko...nglibog jud ko....

The way I see it:
Wala siya mo palag because,
she does not want to lose you as friend.
Problem with us guys, we easily misinterpret things.

More than creating friendship, we create a habit.
It is a social habit,
if you text each other and call each other everyday.
and habits are hard to break.

That is why if a girl has a cellphone,
its very easy to get that girl when you already know her number.
You just send her a message or a joke everyday,
then she will expect to get a message from you everyday.
And she will miss you if you wont text her.
And she probably think that she already loves you.

It is also unfair for her if you do anything now.
You are still on a "bounce".
Any relationship you get into is not really that stable.
You must have loved your ex so much to still remember her.
And if she comes back to you in time,
and you got this friend as a girlfriend,
then you really have a great problem.
And that is not good especially she is your confidant.
Your best friend becomes your worst enemy.
This is what happened to Erap and Chavit Singson.

[azeroth]

thankx doc, maybe i just misinterpreted her good intentions in helping me...
maybe ill just wait for the right time..

[rod_x]

nakasala ko sa ako uyab. naa jud nahitabo namu sa katong 3rd party. after 2 days wa nakaya sa akong konsenxa ni.admit ko niya. then ako iyang gipapili if ma.unsa na mi. 'cool off' lang ako gipili. nya nitxt xa the next day wa sad ko kaagwanta di mureply and ultimately ngkita mi nya nagbalik napod. pero karon ambot dali ra kaau ko sapoton niya kung magsturya mi sa fone or in person. nganu ingani man akong gibati? diba dapat namawi man unta ko? grabe na kaau xa ni.consider sa akong gibuhat. ako na hinuon ang nag.buang2. nya karon gitagaan ko niyag time and space to think about things, pero wa pod ko kaagwanta nitxt ko niya ganina. iya kong gi.ingnan nga di na kuno nako xa hinay2on ug patay. dritsoon na daw nako kay sakit na kaau. so, buwagan na jud nako xa?

[Soul Doctor]

nakasala ko sa ako uyab. naa jud nahitabo namu sa katong 3rd party. after 2 days wa nakaya sa akong konsenxa ni.admit ko niya. then ako iyang gipapili if ma.unsa na mi. 'cool off' lang ako gipili. nya nitxt xa the next day wa sad ko kaagwanta di mureply and ultimately ngkita mi nya nagbalik napod. pero karon ambot dali ra kaau ko sapoton niya kung magsturya mi sa fone or in person. nganu ingani man akong gibati? diba dapat namawi man unta ko? grabe na kaau xa ni.consider sa akong gibuhat. ako na hinuon ang nag.buang2. nya karon gitagaan ko niyag time and space to think about things, pero wa pod ko kaagwanta nitxt ko niya ganina. iya kong gi.ingnan nga di na kuno nako xa hinay2on ug patay. dritsoon na daw nako kay sakit na kaau. so, buwagan na jud nako xa?

Once naay mahitabo nga ingon ana duna jud na siyay consequence sa inyong usag-usa.
Next time.
Ayaw na lang isulti tanan.
Although ang babae gustog honesty.
But they can not handle the truth that well.
That goes with men too.
Sometimes what they do not know wont hurt them.
But since andyan na yan,
wala ka nang magawa kundi i-prove na dimo na gagawin iyon uli.
It will take time.
ayaw lang kasuko nga lahi ang inyong reactions kaysa imong gi-expect.
Its clear that you can not live without each other for now.
But you must acknowledge that it is also painful for her to know that she has been betrayed.
Just understand that. Do anything to console her.
Be sensitive with her feelings more next time.

[Soul Doctor]

i mean romantic love....


from your definition doc, are same s3x relationships considered love?
how about third party relationships?

Same *** relationships are mostly physical in nature.
If it is really love,
then you would chose to be friends only because of the unusual situation.

Third party relationships is not love.
Its just putting something in place of what your present love do not have.
If your girlfriend is not having s.e.x as much as you wanted,
you will look for a third party to fill that need.

[V@nity]

Hello Doc,
Why I feel this way like I'm jealous or afraid that my mr. unavailable ex will turn amazingly great partner to his new found girl? We didn't have closure to our past relationship. He left me with that new found girl in his office. But still he keeps calling/ asking how I am, clinging on my personal life. Though I apply the 60-day no contact rule, but I slide sometimes. But I'm trying to fulfill it. Yun nga lang, sometimes I get mad/jealous that he will turn out to be a super nice guy na to other girl but not a chance with me. Why Im feeling this bah?