Qantas Pilots and Mechanics

[unofficialplayer]

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After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet,
which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics
correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then
pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.
Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor.

Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas pilots
and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, Qantas
is the only major airline that has never had an accident.

P= The problem logged by the pilot. S= The solution and action taken by
the mechanics.


P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute
descent
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget
pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget

[stingrey]

whahahahahaha... arcamax man ni!

[GemWArrioR]

unsa na langa ani, katawa jud ko
hahahahahha

[mokszilla_20]

watay mahems.... ahhhhh basta katawa nlang tah... ha ha ha ha ha

[JChem]

hahahahahaahahaa! butangi ok sad ang mga mechanics da!

[digitalsuperman]

hahah.ahak..bugal-bugalon kaayo ang mechanics sa QANTAS...
tinuod gyud ni noh?

[rickdy]

hehehe, funny

[reibac]

and that's mechanics with sense of humor!!!

[darkdevil]

hahaha..grabe sa mechanics uy...

[Onins]

hahaha nahulog ko silya!