Intellectual stimulation. The same background. Partnership. Humor. Unprintably good s♥x. Longtime wives tell us what drew (and still draws) them to their husbands and offer advice to the young and un-hooked-up. Read on:
Couple #1:
Beth and Martin Johnson
Ages: 43 and 42
Years married: 20
Occupations: Independent school admissions director; counselor for disabled adults
How did you know he was the one?
We were working at Roy Rogers the year after high school. I saw him and got goose bumps. But it was more about who he was on the inside. He's a deep thinker. He's slow to anger. He wanted to be part of my life. He's got the greatest smile and the cutest butt; calf muscles to die for. He came down the steps recently, had on jeans and an undershirt with no sleeves, and leaned on the banister, and I was like, "Ahhhh. Take me, I'm yours." He still does it for me.
What's made it last?
The truth? The *** is phenomenal. We can't keep our hands off each other. Our children tell us, "Get a room." The older you get, the better it gets. You know more. Your bodies change and you get a bigger bed. And you make sure it doesn't squeak. We're both more patient. There are things I've done I'm not willing to have in print.
Advice?
Keep everybody else out of your business. That's huge. If you need counseling, get an impartial person—not someone on his side of the family or one of your girlfriends. When the deal goes down at night, it's just the two of you.
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Couple #2:
Georgia and Jerry Carter
Ages: Both 51
Years married: 30
Occupations: Wedding coordinator; advertising executive
How did you know he was the one? That tingle. We were sophomores in high school, and I used to watch him come out of the boys' bathroom and go to the water fountain every day at lunch. I used to stare at him. We officially met at a formal school Easter dance, and we were inseparable from that night on. That was 1967.
What's made it last? You always have to have something to look forward to, and we're always on the go. Jerry walked in last night and said, "Want to go to Reno?"
Advice? Always be open. Don't be afraid to say what's on your mind. I used to keep it all inside, and then I'd get mad. I just didn't want to talk or tell him how I felt. I can remember my daughter saying, "Why are you keeping it in? That's so stupid!" That was about ten years ago. I don't do that anymore. Even if it hurts, say it.
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Lessons... Insights... Lightbulb moments? Care to share yours?
Choosing the Right Man: What Happily Married Women Know
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