A young man signed up with the paratroopers. He went through the standard training, completed practice jumps from high structures, and finally took his first jump from the airplane. The next day, he called his father to tell him the news. "So did you jump?", the father asked.
"Well, when the sergeant opened the door and asked for volunteers, about a dozen men got up and just walked out of the plane!"
"Is that when you jumped?"
"Not yet. The sergeant started to grab the other men and throw them out of the door."
"Did you jump then?", asked the father.
"I'm getting to that. Every one else had jumped, and I was the only one left. I told the sergeant that I was too scared to jump. He told me to jump or he'd kick my ass."
"So did you jump?"
"Not then. He tried to push me out, but I held onto the door. Finally he called the jump master, who's about six-foot five and 250 pounds. The guy took his ***** out and it was about 10 inches long and as big around as a baseball bat! He said, "Boy, either you jump out that door, or I'm sticking this up your ass."
"So did you jump?" asked the father.
"Well, a little.... at first."
Jumping Up
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