CaLLCenTeR BLooPeRs

[archiesj29]

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outbound agent trying to convince an existing cx to renew their subscription...

agentwith a carabaw accent)

"are you soore ma'am you don't want to renew hmm?"

cx: "ahmm its okay you can just cancel it dear"

agent: "are you soore ma'am hmm? its por pree ok?"

cx: "no no dear"

agent: "aw ikaw"

cx: "excuse me?"

[katy_aryan]

nakaremember ko sa mga times na agent pa ko..hayssss.... callcenter life...

[carmel17_87]

i always find time to visit this page everyday.... couldn't keep me from laughing!!!!! two thumbs up!!!

[clinically.dead]

These are not my experiences. I just find them too funny not to share. The bloopers in the stories are made by the customers, I hope that's okay in this thread. Spoiler-tagged for convenience:

IQ Phone Home

Spoiler! 

Me: “Hello, you’ve reached [phone support]. What appears to be the problem?”

Caller: “Yes, I’m calling because I have been unable to make phone calls from my home phone.”

Me: “Ma’am, what phone are you calling from right now?”

Caller: “My home phone, why?” *pause* “Wait, you’ve fixed it! Thank you!” *hangs up*

Lt. Dan's Fruit Company

Spoiler! 

Caller: “It won’t stop loading! I’ve been waiting for twenty minutes and it hasn’t stopped loading yet! Help me!”

Me: “Alright, ma’am. Let’s start by refreshing the page.”

Caller: “Re… what?”

Me: “Refreshing, ma’am.”

Caller: “How do I do so?”

Me: “Which kind if computer do you have?”

Caller: “Why?”

Me: “Which button you have to push depends on your computer. Is it a normal PC or an Apple?”

Caller, to husband: “Honey, she’s rambling! Now she thinks we’re selling apples! How stupid does she think I am!?” *click*

Personal Caller

Spoiler! 

Me: “Thank you for calling customer service. My name is [name]. How can I help you today?”

Elderly Customer: “Are you a person? A real live person?”

Me: “Yes ma’am, I certainly am.”

Elderly Customer: “I got a person! I GOT A PERSON! Oh my goodness, I got a real person!”

You can read more here.

[kit_cebu]

^one of the few reasons why i quit call center job.......

[cliffrabuya]

haha. makalingaw lagi noh?

[yiennahs]

here's another one, with my co agent....

Agent: How can i help you?
Customer: (*irate) I can't connect on the internet... This computer really sucks...
Agent: Im so sorry to hear that mam.... What's the brand of your unit?
Customer: What?!?!
Agent: What's the brand of your notebook?
Customer: (shouting*) It's an INTEL inside....
Agent: Im sorry...?
Customer: (very irate*) I TOLD YOU!!! I HAVE an INTEL INSIDE COMPUTER!!!!!

hahaha nakabantay ko ba daghan jud cx na si kabaw unsay brand ug OS sa ilang computer hehehe

[yiennahs]

These are not my experiences. I just find them too funny not to share. The bloopers in the stories are made by the customers, I hope that's okay in this thread. Spoiler-tagged for convenience:

IQ Phone Home

Spoiler! 

Me: “Hello, you’ve reached [phone support]. What appears to be the problem?”

Caller: “Yes, I’m calling because I have been unable to make phone calls from my home phone.”

Me: “Ma’am, what phone are you calling from right now?”

Caller: “My home phone, why?” *pause* “Wait, you’ve fixed it! Thank you!” *hangs up*

Lt. Dan's Fruit Company

Spoiler! 

Caller: “It won’t stop loading! I’ve been waiting for twenty minutes and it hasn’t stopped loading yet! Help me!”

Me: “Alright, ma’am. Let’s start by refreshing the page.”

Caller: “Re… what?”

Me: “Refreshing, ma’am.”

Caller: “How do I do so?”

Me: “Which kind if computer do you have?”

Caller: “Why?”

Me: “Which button you have to push depends on your computer. Is it a normal PC or an Apple?”

Caller, to husband: “Honey, she’s rambling! Now she thinks we’re selling apples! How stupid does she think I am!?” *click*

Personal Caller

Spoiler! 

Me: “Thank you for calling customer service. My name is [name]. How can I help you today?”

Elderly Customer: “Are you a person? A real live person?”

Me: “Yes ma’am, I certainly am.”

Elderly Customer: “I got a person! I GOT A PERSON! Oh my goodness, I got a real person!”

You can read more here.

hahahhahahaha mga ingnoranteng daku lol

[yiennahs]

A Marketing Consultant @ Xlibris trying to explain where the Authors books will be available...

Me: You know Harry Potter? uhm the book not yet the movie... ahhh... your book will be right beside that book.. isn't that amazing?

Author: So, which bookstores will my book be displayed in?

Me: You know, like aahhh... Barnes & Nobles, uhm Border and uhm let's see... 200 other bookstores(but never mentioning that it's just an online bookstore not a physical bookstore wehehe)

Author: OMG!!! tell me more, tell me more!!!

Me: Ahhh.. There's really a lot of bookstores to mention ma'am...

Author: Please, tell me more.. I'm so excited!!!

Me: AAhhh.. well.. uhm.. we also have it available at National Bookstore and uhm... Oh! we have it in BookSale at SM

Author: SM? where's that?

Me: oh it's there... chi~ching... money in the bank!!!

hahaha kalingaw ani oi

[yiennahs]

hahaha.. mao jud ni akong madunggan sauna ug mag.evals.. naa pai

tsr: ok lets check connectivity sir. i want you to go to "www.barney.com"
cx: ok im there
tsr: now do u see barney?
cx: yes?
tsr: do you know why barney is smiling at you?
cx: no? why?
tsr: barney is smiling at you because you are connected to the internet..
===mga pamatay na linya sa agent========
hahaha and daghan2x jud mgamit ani na style.. pero lingaw2x ra gud!

adikkkkkkkkkkkkk hahaha ganahan ko ani dah!