bisaya jokes...

[Dark]

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ROSARIO UG EDAD
Gipangutana ang usa ka pari sa iyang higala kung unsay kalingawan niini,
"Padre, unsa may imong lingaw? Matod pa sa Pari, "Misa, sige Rosario mao ra," ug mitawag ang Pari aron mosugo, "Rosario itempla mig kape!
Dihang nagulang-gulang na ang Pari, diha na usay nangutana kun unsay iyang kalingawan.
"Padre unsa na may imong lingaw ron?" "Dile na kaayo mag sige ROSARIO dong, kay may EDAD na man, ug mitawag ang Pari arong musogo, "EDAD mari ka ragud!"

[redman69]

The Power of Alcohol



A man is waiting for his wife to give birth.
The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs.
The son is just a head!
But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion.

After 21 years, the son is now old enough for his first drink.
Dad takes him to the bar, tearfully tells the son he is proud of him and orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy.
With all the bar patrons looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of alcohol.

Swoooosh! Plop!! A torso pops out!
The bar is dead silent; then bursts into whoops of joy.
The father, shocked, begs his son to drink again.
The patrons chant 'Take another drink!'
The bartender continues to shake his head in dismay.

Swoooosh! Plip! Plop!! Two arms pop out.
The bar goes wild!
The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again.
The patrons chant, 'Take another drink! Take another drink!!'
The bartender ignores the whole affair and goes back to polishing glasses, shaking his head, clearly unimpressed by the amazing scenes.

By now the boy is getting tipsy, but with his new hands he reaches down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it.

Plop! Plip!! Two legs pop out.
The bar is in chaos!

The father falls to his knees and tearfully thanks God.
The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left then staggers to the right through the front door, into the street, where a truck runs over him and kills him instantly.
The bar falls silent.

The father moans in grief.
The bartender sighs, then says,



*



*




(Wait for it)



*



*


*



(It's coming)



*



*




(Ya ready?)


*

*


*



(Don't hate me)



*



*



*



(Yer gonna hate me)




*


*



(Take a deep breath)



*



*

*





'He should've quit while he was a head."



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A day in CDO

[mainframe]

INDAY
MC: Unsa'y kantahon nimo, Miss?
Contestant: Inday.
MC: Inday? Wala may kanta nga "Inday."
Contestant: Naa uy! Katong kang Whitney Houston'g kanta ba nga "INDAAAAY WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU."

hahahhaha... pastilan c inday.

[angolan]

hahahhhahhhhhahar!

nice one bro!

totoy jud....

[thedeadboy]

In a classy bar:
GERMAN: Waiter, Remy Martin, single
FRENCH: Waiter, Carlo Rossi, double
PINOY: (magpaila pa diay ta usa maka order?) Waiter, Pablo Taklob, married

[juan penduko]

amahan gipalayas ang anak. kai naka pamabdos.

amahan: layas didto kai wala jud ko mosunod sa akong mga tambag dha nimo. sugod karn ayaw nako tawagan amanhan. dili napud tka anak. hala layas
anak: aw mao man kaha na imong gusto. hala cge. adto nako noy

9 ka bulan ang nilabay.....

amahan: o nibalik man ka? gatuo ka nga akong kang pasayloon?
anak wala noy oi. ako unta kang kuhaon nga ninong sa akong anak ba para magkumpare nalang ta. wahahahahah

[adie0525]

amahan gipalayas ang anak. kai naka pamabdos.

amahan: layas didto kai wala jud ko mosunod sa akong mga tambag dha nimo. sugod karn ayaw nako tawagan amanhan. dili napud tka anak. hala layas
anak: aw mao man kaha na imong gusto. hala cge. adto nako noy

9 ka bulan ang nilabay.....

amahan: o nibalik man ka? gatuo ka nga akong kang pasayloon?
anak wala noy oi. ako unta kang kuhaon nga ninong sa akong anak ba para magkumpare nalang ta. wahahahahah

hahahahah oh yeah!!! kumpare nalang sila!!!

[goriosan]

bogoyah aning bisaya ng binuang oi, malingaw ka gyud.. pasiaw pa!

[miraculousimage]

more! nice kaayo diri.. lingaw kaayo!

[rapido]

@redman69 fail nman sad ka idol kaduha na jud! binisaya man gud ni nga joke.. hahahaha


FAIL!!!