Hospital Charts Bloopers

[mata_hari]

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ACTUAL SENTENCES FOUND IN PATIENTS' HOSPITAL CHARTS

> 01. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
> 02. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
> 03. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.
> 04. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
> 05. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
> 06. Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.
> 07. Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
> 08. The patient refused autopsy.
> 09. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
> 10. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
> 11. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.
> 12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
> 13. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
> 14. Since she can't get pregnant with her husband, I thought you might like to work her up.
> 15. She is numb from her toes down.
> 16. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.
> 17. The skin was moist and dry.
> 18. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
> 19. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
> 20. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
> 21. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
> 22. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
> 23. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
> 24. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
> 25. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
> 26. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock broker instead.
> 27. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
> 28. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
> 29. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
> 30. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
> 31. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

[mackycoi]

ipa close ni nga hospital oi..asa man dapita..bwahahaha

[Dreadload_fatal]

way ayo ani hospitala gud!! hahahahha

[mata_hari]

actually i found this one in the
Pinoy.md website

i really found this funny

[MrsJack]

nice one!

[dr_raine]

wa manay klaro XD

[ska_nurse]

hahahaha....nauns mana uy...reactive to light na diay ang mga breasts nato karon?

[deespter]

haha dghana lingaw ani ui.. kntawa jd ko pg maau...

[handsoff241]

kalouy sa mga patient didto hehehe

[bellamoda]

i like how we have our thyroid up our a** hahahaha. pretty funny.
some had 1 letter misspelled and it totally butchered the sentence.