Originally Posted by
mataid
@icup: I think you are right..we're not connecting with each other..I thought we were. It has been like this since we got married. Pero hinay-hinay sya. I was so indenial at first. Karon pa jud ko nakamata.
Dont forget this is a two way process. What you felt from him is always the same as what he felt from you. You are lucky he is still with you. Why he did not left you all this time? There must be some reason, you need to figure this out.
i am not ashamed to admit this. And I think there's nothing wrong with being practical. For me, why would we settle for less? It was not just because of that why I married him.. it was because I thought he was the man for me. I had a stable job before..earn something enough to be totally independent and was able to support my sister's studies as well. Stupid me that I gave it up for him (not because I want to..but because that's what he wants me to do)
I cant believe you have the audacity to say this! Did you tell your husband about this? I bet you did not!...Therefore, you can not commit to him if he has nothing? TYPICAL!!..The problem starts within you. No offense. No man in his right senses would even give you the chance to you walk in the isle if they know that this is one of your "QUALIFICATION". What a shame. If a man believes that you have substantial income to sustained your lifestyle, why bother to work somewhere else.
How come? I only react according to what I feel. I don't hate the relationship. I just feel sorry for myself
How about your husband. In your right mind, you really believes that your husband has no emotion to deal with, that is generated from what is the purpose why you marry him? I hope this is not the reason. You owe to be soryy for him.
@maitoots: This is what I am longing for. You know when he said that.."You should find another F*$%#$@ husband!"..gi ingnan nako sya na.."If that is what you want me to do, Sure I will..and I will find somebody who knows my worth as a woman..and that would treat me like a human.
Our situation man kay ako gadala sa tanan panginabuhi namo, pag abot sa balay gikan work, usahay motagbo..most of the time, dili jud..igo ra mag ask if how's the business going today? did you do this and that? Are they making money?..Mao na sya, He doesn't even bother to ask how I am..he doesn't know na wala pa ko naka eat tungod sa ka busy. Naa pa jud time na if gusto mag rest sako gamay, he would ask me if I can do this and that right away..as in ora mismo. Dili man gali mangagda ug kaon. Mulakaw lang ug walay pananghid. Mubalik without saying anything..bisan hi and hello man lang. Matulog, talikdan pud ta. If ako mulakaw, mananghid jud ko nya pero kibir ra sya.
I guess your husband has enough. I can see a nagging personality in you. He probably just stayed hoping that you will be able to figure out how disappointed and frustrated he is.
@vanav: I know. But it's so hard if you're partner is selfish..who only thinks about his own happiness. Yes, financially wala sya nag kulang. that's not just what I want. I want some affection and respect from him.
You can only have so much. You gain some, you lose some. I bet your husband is not happy from the beginning too, who will. Now you are talking about affection and respect. To start with you said you are just a practical woman who happens to include financial capacity included in your qualification.
@arndtnelson: I do. Infact, I've done everything for him..everything he wants..to the extent that I almost forgot myself. I've had enough. He was the one who gave me the idea of divorce. I think he was trying to test me. He must have assumed that I could not stand on my own feet financially. Coz I gave up my career because that's what he wants me..That is the biggest mistake I've ever made. Pero wala nako patuli ang pag ingon nya ug gusto ba ko ug divorce. It took me a month to realized things. And I've had enough already...and enough of my being a martyr.
I dont believe you did everything. If you do, you dont complain to start with because its the product of discontentment, your fantasy did not meet your expectation. Divorce is just another expression....rampantly used now to couples and married individuals who can not resolve their indifferences...If you are committed, you dont turn your back.
@tamse: I don't know if that's really what he wants. When he asked me if I want a divorce, i didn't answer him back. So for him, silent means yes. Then gi kwentahan na nuon ko. He said, that I wouldn't be where I am now, not because of him. Tapos gibalik nako sa iyaha ang iyahang gisulti nako..kay dili tungod nako, wala sya dinhi. He wouldn't have a pretty laid-back life here, if dili tungod nako. I have feeling kasi that he only married me so he can get a permanent residence here. Kay dili man sya makapaharuhay sa ilaha lugar. kay if didto baya sa ilaha, kailanga jud mag hago ug work.
@monrose29: I will..again..just for the sake sa marriage. Frankly speaking, I can say that I am not happy anymore. It's weird but I like the idea of staying away from him. Sis, do you think a vacation to take some time off would help?
You really think marriage is all happiness...LIFE in general is not, combining two people with different background and roots wont make it better.
@emnace09: Maayo man among relationship sa uyab pa mi. He was the kind of man that every women want to have..ideal man, ika nga.
Fantasy
@scytheb_2501: Grabe pud ni. Dili man pud. He would still have S (Yes, *** ra jud ang term..I can't use the word Lovemaking..coz it's like a "Hit and Run") with me pero I've noticed him that he's withdrawing it.And his S is Mao wala jud mi kabuo for 2 years na.
Withdrawal is at the last stage of a RUINED relationship.
@lovely_chic: Noooo..mao jud na sya sis. They're protecting themselves from getting hurt..Little do they know that they're hurting us from protecting themselves.
Thanks so much for all your replies. I really appreciate them. Thank you..thank you..thank you..
but thank God i realized that there's no way of staying with him...after i broke up with him i really cried but murag naibtan sad ko ug tunok...do whatever makes you happy sis even it will result into a broken family....the more you let yourself be hurt the more it complicates........
let him go if he wants to be free lang sis...
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