If The Feeling is Gone?

[jrluzana]

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only time will tell

[jeppoy]

mau lng ni nga pangutana kay wla man mo ani nga situation...but if kamo ang nabutang ani daw ang inyong partner ang nawad.an na og gugma sa inyo...din kamo gugma.an pa sa inyong partner...unsaon man kuno na ninyo pg.buhi....mo let go lng daun ka kuno....ai dont tink so....be in the situation and tell me kong nice ba ang feeling...kung tsada ba nga ang imong partner na.wad.an na og gugma diha nimu...tan.awon ta kong dili ka masakitan...

[redzki]

u have to clarify your feelings towards your partner. do not rush things, u have to take time examining your feelings. you must be certain that you no longer love him/her.

there are "dry" times in a relationship where you loose interest in your relationship but these only is normal. if you still love the person you will reAlize sooner or later that you still want him/her. before you let go u should know for sure you'll not want him/her bck before everthing becomes irreversible. these times can test the love that couples have for each other.

[redzki]

O.T pls permit me to share a wonderful story of a couple:

Perhaps you'll gonna love your husband/wife more after reading this.
For singles, we can surely learn something from this story.

When You Divorce Me, Carry MeOut in Your Arms


On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.

This was the scene of ten years ago.

The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid, I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affections between us seemed to ebb.

She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school. Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.

Then Dew came into my life.
It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love.
This was the apartment I bought for her. Dew said, You are the kind of man who best draws girls eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls. Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn t help doing so. I moved Dew's hands aside and said, You go to select some furniture, O.K.? I ve got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised her to go and see with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me.

However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.

One day I said to her in a slight joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn t imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.

When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking with her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes. Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more. When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I ve got something to tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want to divorce. I raised a serious topic calmly. She didn t seem to be much annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?. I m serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! .At that night, we didn t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew. With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer. A late night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn t want anything from me,but I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the month s time we must live as normal life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn t want him to see our marriage was broken. She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember . You carried me in your arms , she continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce.

From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning.I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage with a romantic form.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.
My wife and I hadn t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out for the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words> brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don t tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for bus, I drove to office.On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn t looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face. On the third day, she whispered to me, The outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vaguer. On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc.I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn t tell Dew about this. I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, All my dresses have grown fatter. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head. Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an> essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking fromthe bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, Actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old. I held her tightly and said, Both you and I didn t notice that our life was lack of such intimacy. I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won t divorce. I m serious. She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head.
Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn t value the details of life, not because we didn t love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into cry. I walked downstairs and drove to the office. When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the greeting words on the card.

I smiled and wrote, I ll carry you out every morning until we are old.

[jrluzana]

touchy.......
pero wa ko ka gets sa moral.. hehehe

[Julia78]

just be yourself...if you falling out of love... so be it... tell your girl the truth... if you still care for her even as a friend...she ought to know what your real score is... she'll be more hurt if you'll let the situation flow by itself... be responsible bro!... you're in a relationship you have your duties... begin now or regret someday ... God bless and Good luck! ...

[bUrbY_dUll]

i think when the feeling is not there anymore...in my case i wanted to get rid of this feeling for so long now coz im actually having this at the moment but then i just cant get him off of my head..coz he happens to be my officemate...we always see each other at the office..and the fact that he has a gf doesnt really changed my feelings towards him..i hope this feeling would be gone for good...

[joaquin]

what if you fall out of love and fall for other person.... obs cure not intentionaly... or having relationship with another guy/gurl?

[wengsibi]

what if you fall out of love and fall for other person.... obs cure not intentionaly... or having relationship with another guy/gurl?

I was actually in this situation,I was slowly falling out of love and wala nako nabantayi nga im falling in love wd another.Moa diay to nga magsige nalang mi away sa akong ex.But what happened was,my ex and i broke up and i became good friends sa guy nga unconciously, i was falling in love wd.After 3 months sa break up nako sa ex,ive decided to let my feelings for the other loose.I guess, what i mean to say is that,if you are falling out of love,end it.ayaw ug paasaha ang imo uyab kay unfair sa iyaha.I know, it seemed cruel and ma hurt gyud sya maau but at least,you dont give ur uyab false hopes dba.And if your falling inlove wd another,take time.Ayaw ug rush.Be sure sa imo desisyon nga that is what you really wantDili kay, if dili na mo work out, balik pud dayon ka imo ex.you dont have the right to do that.

[nathan]

redzki:

That was a touching story that even as i am reading it now...i am into a deep sorry state for my huney who has been with me for five long years....no am not married yet. siguro i dont believe in falling out of love as this idea is absurd. there will be temptations...yeah...people whom when you look at them may seem to look better and sexier than your love....but isnt this all? temptation? this is how you prove your worth to the person you promised forever with.

if falling out of love is true, then there would have been no marriage and no old people looking happy still together. if falling out of love is true then we are no more than animals or dogs even--that in the slight (sorry for the word) arousal over someone else would make us leave our GF/wife/BF/husband for the benefit of satisfying our hunger for sexual actions. we grow older and less attractive physically...but we should try to see deeper than what the physical state shows...deeper and you will realize that the man/woman that you have loved grows even more beautiful.

we must not forget to nurture our relationships with intimacy, intimacy that transcends beyond ***. always remember that love is something we have to treasure...something we have to nurture.

...in the end, i do believe that the only person you will faithfully be with would be the very person you shared and promised forever.

wow....amazing...did i write this?

nathan