Divorce, Legal Separation, Annulment: What is your stand?

[Gwynhuever]

@jugs...morag sakto sad ka sa imong pangagpas bro da....

anyway i already expressed my opinion about this...pero ako lang usbon kay dugay na man to ako post....i am in favor for divorce etc etc....mas in favor jud ko for marriage of course....pero di man ko pabor to spend the rest of my life in misery...so ok lang sad naa divorce2...

[rey04]

when we marry we always try our best to be infront of the altar, aight. so marriage is based on the teachings of the church and since we're in the philippine setting so we just have follow no questions asked because our country itself is so conservative because of the influence of the church.

i think no new couples wished to have their marriage annulled years after they take their vows, aight.

if the family is incomplete then ang tawag na ana is broken family and theres many children claiming to come from a broken family and its not nice to hear those words, aight. for me making a family is a survival thing, matirang matibay, coz you really cannot predict the future...

[rey04]

i don't think you want to have a child out of wedlock, aight.neither your child too...

ha? so magkafamily lang if maminyo na? mura'g dili man siguro boss. the same ra na sa house... not all houses are homes! It depends on the people living there.

[d`monyita]

ha? so magkafamily lang if maminyo na? mura'g dili man siguro boss. the same ra na sa house... not all houses are homes! It depends on the people living there.

FAMILY AS DEFINED BY MERIAM WEBSTER:

Main Entry: 1fam·i·ly
Pronunciation: 'fam-lE, 'fa-m&-
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural -lies
Etymology: Middle English familie, from Latin familia household (including servants as well as kin of the householder), from famulus servant
1 : a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head : HOUSEHOLD
2 a : a group of persons of common ancestry : CLAN b : a people or group of peoples regarded as deriving from a common stock : RACE
3 a : a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation : FELLOWSHIP b : the staff of a high official (as the President)
4 : a group of things related by common characteristics: as a : a closely related series of elements or chemical compounds b : a group of soils with similar chemical and physical properties (as texture, pH, and mineral content) that comprise a category ranking above the series and below the subgroup in soil classification c : a group of related languages descended from a single ancestral language
5 a : the basic unit in society traditionally consisting of two parents rearing their children; also : any of various social units differing from but regarded as equivalent to the traditional family <a single-parent family> b : spouse and children <want to spend more time with my family>
6 a : a group of related plants or animals forming a category ranking above a genus and below an order and usually comprising several to many genera b in livestock breeding (1) : the descendants or line of a particular individual especially of some outstanding female (2) : an identifiable strain within a breed
7 : a set of curves or surfaces whose equations differ only in parameters
8 : a unit of a crime syndicate (as the Mafia) operating within a geographical area
- fam·i·ly·hood /-"hud/ noun

i think no new couples wished to have their marriage annulled years after they take their vows, aight.

TRUE. but lemme ask you... based on what i have read from your former posts about your wife and/or married life.... IF for example PUWEDE ang divorce diri sa ato.... or kung dili ka devout catholic as you espouse.... will you remain married to her?

if the family is incomplete then ang tawag na ana is broken family and theres many children claiming to come from a broken family and its not nice to hear those words, aight. for me making a family is a survival thing, matirang matibay, coz you really cannot predict the future...

I think that is the problem... we think that BROKENNESS stems from being buwag.... what about disunity in the family... lack of a cohesive factor of unity? isnt that more pathetic than a "broken" family? lack of love... marital infidelity... verbal/physical abuse... rebellious kids.... those are signs that the marriage/family is BREAKing down. tantamount to being a broken family di ba?

you make marriage sound like a hopeless struggle... matirang matibay as u say.... but what is "matibay" about a family that doesnt care about each other? oo nga... married nga ang parents... pero... you know what i mean.... walang matibay ana bai...

dont get me wrong... I AM PRO-MARRIAGE...that is an act sanctified by God..... and unless lagi i-abuse ako ug ako kid/s.... dili gyud ko mubuwag. but even sa Bible... ok lang man ma-separate... wag lang remarry.

i don't think you want to have a child out of wedlock, aight.neither your child too...

i have a child out of wedlock. i CHOSE it.... and only because I, unlike some others, had the forsight to know that a life married to his dad will be hell on earth.

oh and btw... WE ARE A FAMILY....my son and i... nothing broken between him and me....

[n`gel]

It's easy for a happily-married with his chosen great love-person to say ideal things about marriage... and see others as unfamily or inappropriate or wrong mindset or decision. Unfortunately, not everyone is on the same state the moment the marriage took place. The only advantage I saw in my personal life being here in the US where there's divorce is the chance to right my life, repair it, and get back on track to happiness after being forced to marry somebody I did not love. But when I finally marry the one I choose, in the future, I will hold on to it til death and get married in Church.

Yes, there are truly plenty of valid reasons why divorce, separation or annullment is an option. PERO, it should be after all much effort of reconciliation, marriage counseling, etc. Although moana gyud ko nga lisud kaayo nang pinugos kay ako mismo nakasuway ug ingon ana. I agree with d` ... she and her son is a family, and sa pinas grabe kaayo ta family-support system, daghang mohulip sa love nga pagkuwang from a father figure, although naay difference pero we can't help it. Life must go on.

[d`monyita]

hi sis.... kita diri family man pud ta bah.... to quote ms. webster again:

3 a : a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation

[rey04]

@ d'monyita - mao lagi na ingon nako sis that we are in the philippine setting and forced to abide the rules based on the laws available on our country.


TRUE. but lemme ask you... based on what i have read from your former posts about your wife and/or married life.... IF for example PUWEDE ang divorce diri sa ato.... or kung dili ka devout catholic as you espouse.... will you remain married to her?


it all depends to her and me coz one cannot make decisions without the others affirmation. and its hard to make decisions such as this especially "love" is still there. if love is absent na then that could be the time to decide which is best. I also think there is no such things as perfect marriages/couple, depende ra gyud na sa inyoha mao nang matirang matibay because you decided to marry without anyone forcing you. It also depend on how you handle your marital problems, for me I take it as a challenge from above. As they say that God didn't give man a burden that he cannot carry.

[Ms.Beau]

hi sis.... kita diri family man pud ta bah.... to quote ms. webster again:

3 a : a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation

yes, that's correct mother dee. in fact at KIDS', children are taught a new definition of FAMILY: a group of people living together and caring for each other.

@rey04: you might react to that definition, so let me share now that the issue of family is a sensitive one especially for educators. in this setting man gud, one has to be socially sensitive for not all children come from the traditional family definition of "father, mother, sister, brother, and dog." in our case, we have single-parent families and we would NEVER EVER want a child to feel less about herself/himself because of an absent father or mother.

i remember a 4 year-old telling me once, "Ms. Beau, wala ra ba koy papa...." and implying that the others are luckier. i had to pause for my reply...and it came out,"sagdi lang...naa bitaw kay mommy ug auntie ug lola ug cousins ug tito ug tita...love man ka nila.". Now that's family.

just felt the need to share that.

[d`monyita]

yes, that's correct mother dee. in fact at KIDS', children are taught a new definition of FAMILY: a group of people living together and caring for each other.

@rey04: you might react to that definition, so let me share now that the issue of family is a sensitive one especially for educators. in this setting man gud, one has to be socially sensitive for not all children come from the traditional family definition of "father, mother, sister, brother, and dog." in our case, we have single-parent families and we would NEVER EVER want a child to feel less about herself/himself because of an absent father or mother.

i remember a 4 year-old telling me once, "Ms. Beau, wala ra ba koy papa...." and implying that the others are luckier. i had to pause for my reply...and it came out,"sagdi lang...naa bitaw kay mommy ug auntie ug lola ug cousins ug tito ug tita...love man ka nila.". Now that's family.

just felt the need to share that.

thanks for the affirmation sis.... i am very strong in letting anton feel the love of everyone in the family.... that he will not be wanting any from stupid people who just happen to be sperm donors. i forgot where it was that anton pointed out one time ba... na there was this pic in a website of animals and their MOMS being affectionate with each other! what he said made me cry gyud... he goes... THERE IS NO DADDY LAGI NO? JUST LIKE YOU AND ME! WE'RE A TEAM... THEY ARE TEAMS. NO NEED MAN DIAY DADDY GYUD NOH MAMA?

my little man.... wise beyond his years... hahahaha.

i remember the sperm donor ba...one time... when the new law came out that illigitimate kids can carry the dad's last name... he told me paglabas anton... carry his name daw! para daw wala daw stigma sa school... kasi when he was in school.... lakas ng stigma... palibhasa born illigitimate din sya and till now carry pa nya name ng iya mama though married na iya parents... like hellooooooo... no way. ang bati ng last name nya noh! what right does he have to DERPIVE my son of MY last name? mayra ba nga super provider sya nga di ra ba noh! hahahahahahaha. mas class ang akin. besides... there is a new breed coming out... and the stigma is lesser and lesser with each passing year.

one has to be socially sensitive for not all children come from the traditional family definition of "father, mother, sister, brother, and dog

hahahaha. kami ni anton.... me and anton and thomas... his FISH. hahahahahhahaha.

[d`monyita]

@ d'monyita - mao lagi na ingon nako sis that we are in the philippine setting and forced to abide the rules based on the laws available on our country.


TRUE. but lemme ask you... based on what i have read from your former posts about your wife and/or married life.... IF for example PUWEDE ang divorce diri sa ato.... or kung dili ka devout catholic as you espouse.... will you remain married to her?


it all depends to her and me coz one cannot make decisions without the others affirmation. and its hard to make decisions such as this especially "love" is still there. if love is absent na then that could be the time to decide which is best. I also think there is no such things as perfect marriages/couple, depende ra gyud na sa inyoha mao nang matirang matibay because you decided to marry without anyone forcing you.

sa pagkahaba-haba ng mga reactions ng mga tao of the previous page to your definition of family... this is what you latch on sa akong post. hahayyyy.... and this matirang matibay thing was not what set me off gyud.

It also depend on how you handle your marital problems, for me I take it as a challenge from above. As they say that God didn't give man a burden that he cannot carry.

ay di ka kaya tamaan ng kidlat? you are actually saying here that God GAVE you the BURDEN of marriage? He is sooooo good that you cannot pin the "burden" on Him. He instituted marriages for man to be HAPPY. Kanya nga the earthly marriage is a symbolism of the future marriage between Christ and His church.

Yet... you make marriage sound like such a disease.