How To Find Your Soulmate
By John Clifton (How to Find Your Soulmate - Finding Your Soul Mate Advice)
Learning
how to find your soulmate is like learning how to be happy - it's difficult to explain. Telling someone how to find their perfect romantic partner is elusive, because everyone has a different idea what perfect is going to be. Searching for a romance that blends excitement, understanding, and sexual chemistry requires a certain amount of luck. But there are certain ways you can prepare yourself for a soulmate, as well as attract the perfect friend and lover for you.
First, if you don't know what a soulmate is, you won't know that you have one, when you are lucky in love. You might go into each relationship thinking this is the one or this is going to be perfect, only to be disappointed. Or you might have the misfortune of falling for someone who isn't good for you, but tries to gain your affection or sense of obligation by throwing out words and phrases like "love", "true love", and "soulmate".
So before we discuss
finding your soulmate, let's discuss the whole concept of a "soul mate".
Are There Such Things as "Soulmates"?
Absolutely. In your time on this Earth, you've seen people who just were made for each other. You've seen those couples who seem to have no daylight between them, but not in a bad way. This couple's personalities were made to fit together. They make a good team, covering up each other's weaknesses, magnifying each other's strengths, and seem to have similar attitudes about everything else.
How Do I Know If He/She Is a Soulmate?
That's a tough one, but I would say, most of the time, you just know. If I were going to describe what a soul mate is, I would suggest that it starts with a person you feel comfortable with, but at the same time you feel stimulated by. There are plenty of people of people you feel comfortable hanging out with, like your buddies or that friend of the opposite *** you just aren't attracted to. That doesn't make them your soulmate. At the same time, you'll meet plenty of members of the opposite *** whom you're attracted to or whom you have tremendous sexual chemistry with, but the two of you aren't exactly compatible when *** isn't involved.
A soulmate fills the role of friend and lover perfectly. You can be yourself around this person, and being yourself seems to really turn this person on. At the same time, this person seems genuine and comfortable around you, but you're still highly attracted to him or her. But that's only the start of being soulmates.
Do Soulmates Argue and Fight?
Of course, all couples argue and fight, but soulmates are also friends. Two people that have that passionate, love/hate relationship are not soulmates. They're just two people who enjoy living life like a reality show, having blow-ups and make-ups to give their life a little of that Hollywood ambiance. They like drama, and they probably like melodrama. Now that's perfectly alright, if both those people want to live that way (and they can keep their fights legal), but they are not seeking soulmates, whether they call each other that or not.
A soulmate is on your side. He or she has your back. A soulmate is nurturing and open. While the two of you might have lingering issues like any other couple, those issues are not an every day, festering bundle of resentments. They do not turn into tempestuous fights and arguments. Passive-aggressive behavior is not a trait of a soulmate. With a pair of soulmates, the two of you really do enjoy each other's company, and want to nurture and support one another.
If you've been around a while, you realize by now there are all kinds of love. But love with a soulmate also include affection and endearment.
Does Everyone Have Just One Soulmate?
Most people are lucky to find one soulmate in a lifetime, and many people never do. But it's more than likely you have more than one soulmate out there. The only problem is, the world is such a large place and there are so many people in it, you might not ever find that person who is perfect for you. And if you have a soulmate and lose them to bad fortune somehow, you might not ever find another one.
That doesn't mean you won't ever be happy. You can find people you have affection for. You can find people you love. You can even find people who'll love you back. But the two of you won't be that "perfect couple".
Soulmates, Relationships and Growth
This means that soulmates should stay together, because you'll never be happier. But if you do lose your soulmate for some reason - as they say, growing up is growing apart - that doesn't mean you should lose hope you'll find another.
The fallacy of thinking there's only one soulmate for everyone is this idea that people are like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. If you lose that one piece of the puzzle, none of the others in the set will fit together. People aren't as rigid and unyielding as puzzle pieces, though. People can adapt to all kinds of new situations and, sometimes, that adaption helps us grow and become a better person. The second soulmate may not be quite the same as the first, but then, we aren't the same person we were, either.
Soulmate Traits
These are just a few of the traits of being a soulmate:
- Soulmates are honest and open with each other.
- Soulmates enjoy spending time together. This often (but not always) means they share many of the same likes/dislikes.
- A soul mate understands when you're hurting.
- A soul mate makes us a better person.
- A soul mate heals our longstanding emotional wounds.
- A soul mate makes you feel like the romance is a team, not a pair of competitors.
- A soul mate makes us trust them, and helps you trust yourself.
- Soulmates take joy in each other's accomplishments.
- Both soul mates give to the relationship.
Again, you can live in a beautiful relationship and not be soulmates. People make the mistake of turning away from potentially healthy relationships, because they don't think the person is perfect. And as I mentioned earlier, some people love drama in their romances. They thrive on the love/hate relationship. Get two people who share that view and they might have great chemistry, though it drives everyone around them crazy.
My Soulmate
Originally Posted by lovelygirl
Reply With Quote
Posting Permissions
