Ask me any question about relationships

[Ginalyn]

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naa sad ko laing pangutana, how do u tame a spoiled brat? i have a cousin man gud na sukad pa sa bata siya nagdako siya nga ihatag ang tanang gusto. naa man gud siya nagpuyo sa iyang lolo nga spoiler sad kaayo. tanang gusto ihatag, and naanad siya hasta attention naa sa iya. though bibo sya nga pagkabata, and buotan, though pag mutukar lagi iyang spoiled brat instict kay magminaldita, di masabtan ang timpla, mag dumot effect. now she's already ten years old and i would want to help unta kung unsaon siya pag disiplina. luoy man gud akong uncle (iyang lolo) kay old na ba nya retired na og wa na sad iyang wife, nahug na lang na siya ang nag alaga sa bata

Find his weakness. Compress his boundaries.
If he doesn't do what is expected of him, as parents you try to take away his privileges.
if he lives with the lolo then parents should take him away from them,
because they have the tendency to spoil their grand children.
You only return their right to see your son if they become responsible grandparents.

But children usually push their boundaries.
they will always try to see how tough are you as a guardian.
You should always be clear
that the guardian must be the king of the house, and not the child.
If magminaldita take away her privileges.
Walay TV kung magminaldita. Dili kagawas. Ground her.
If ang iyang sayop wala tuyoa, okay ra na.
Pero kung tuyoon na gani unya balikbalikon, sama sa pagminaldita--kinahanglan na jud na wiktan ang lubot. pero i-explain ngano gibuhat na sa iyaha. Pangutan-on sad nimo daan nganu iya nang gibuhat. Kung gahi jud og ulo, then wiktan jud para motagam. Ayaw lang pagdisiplina kung naglagot ka o nasuko ka kay posible magrabehan jud ang imong pagdisiplina.

[Ginalyn]

doc,

jst want to ask y man lisod mo let go sa ex.. y man mag expect pa na mo balik cya nimo after all wat happen. y man i still look for the same man as wat i have before? y man nag start ko pag ka bitter

This is because you do not understand relationships yet.
Relationships go in stages.
The first stages are sweet but towards the end its going to get bitter and worse-- the breakup.
And when you breakup it will leave a whole in your heart and mind. That void will be there for a long time unless you do something to fill that void.

Relationship again is like glue-ing two pieces of paper.
Once you separate them, it will tear one paper if not both.
The paper with the torn hole in it is like the person who can not let go of his love.
He will feel empty and he needs to fill that emptiness with anything.

Then you go through the Stages of Loss or Grief.

If you are in the Denial stage,
you deny the reality that he is already lost and
you still wish he or she will return to you.

And in the Bargaining stage (of your loss),
you will promise to do anything just so things will be the same as it was before.

In the Anger stage, you will start to feel angry and bitter to that person.
But you already lost him or her.

The final stage would be Acceptance.
The sooner you accept that fact the sooner you can move on.

[Ginalyn]

This is the basic reason for this thread.
We should not take relationships lightly.
We should not rush into relationship especially when you are young.
If you go to war without knowledge and training in combat
you surely will go home wounded if not dead.

Same with relationships.
A lot of young boys and girls committed suicide because of failed relationships.
Others lost their minds after a break up which also causes suicide to some.

I say this to the young boys and girls.
Enjoy your life as a single individual.
Have as many friends as you can.
But, do not have boyfriends or girlfriends at a young age.
Sure it looks good in the movies and telenovelas.
Sure it sounds good in the romance novels and pocketbooks.
But in reality, it is a different thing.
They just sugarcoat it in TV, books and movies.
But relationships are more complicated than that.
It takes a mature person to really know how to deal with relationships.

[granz]

This is because you do not understand relationships yet.
Relationships go in stages.
The first stages are sweet but towards the end its going to get bitter and worse-- the breakup.
And when you breakup it will leave a whole in your heart and mind. That void will be there for a long time unless you do something to fill that void.

Relationship again is like glue-ing two pieces of paper.
Once you separate them, it will tear one paper if not both.
The paper with the torn hole in it is like the person who can not let go of his love.
He will feel empty and he needs to fill that emptiness with anything.

Then you go through the Stages of Loss or Grief.

If you are in the Denial stage,
you deny the reality that he is already lost and
you still wish he or she will return to you.

And in the Bargaining stage (of your loss),
you will promise to do anything just so things will be the same as it was before.

In the Anger stage, you will start to feel angry and bitter to that person.
But you already lost him or her.

The final stage would be Acceptance.
The sooner you accept that fact the sooner you can move on.

- tnx sis, maybe that the best thing i can do

[Peenut]

OT: I really admired this thread.

Inspiring.

[darsmith13]

thanks doc, i read ur reply.. maybe i can settle this myself =p..

[Ginalyn]

OT: I really admired this thread.

Inspiring.

OT:
And why does they keep the TS muted?
It been too long since they muted SD.

[rockford_fosgate09]

OT:
mura raman si suol doc ug ginalyin usa mao raman sya mag advice.. up for you doc. goodlcuk

[Ginalyn]

we are related.

[Ginalyn]

yeah you're right, we did meet three times and in unexpected situations.. maybe she is destined for me.. but i will know it sooner or later. thanks for this advice doc.

I think there is something wrong with the way you think about life.

You put too much importance on finding the right person for you.
The other person is nothing but an extension.
Enjoy life alone with family and friends first.

I think you should find yourself first.
I think you have a lot of things to do to find yourself.
If you found yourself,
then it would be easy for that person to find you too.