ka samok ba...
kng sa freedom lang dong, i'm giving more than a gf should give her bf gani. if you can go back and read my "rules" k maka ingon ka, murag d man ni gani usual na gf. k usual na gf tig check baya sa cellphones, emails, networking websites (fb, fs, etc)... ako d jud ko baya inana. i could actually demand anytime, pero ako ni choose nlng ko to trust him.
about loyalty, even if lax kaau ang gf and doesnt check on him or anything, if he's loyal he's really loyal. in the same way, even if strict kaau ang gf, if he's the kind who needs to cheat jud, then he'll always find ways to go around your "rules".....
mao jud.. maka think na ka, nanu masuko ka? dba ingon cla kng guilty ka k most probably masuko jud ka. k the only time cguro na masuko ko, and im not guilty, kanang balik2x gani ang story...
sometimes e-balik pa jud sa akoa ang faults... like one time, nasuko ko k he mentioned na nag selos daw sya k nag flirt2x ko on text, when in fact i showed him the texts soooo many times, never jud ko nag flirt sa other guys even on text eversince we became exclusive... so sapoton ko k sa akoa pa jud gibalik ang wa nako gibuhat pero he himself was doing it: flirting on text, chatting.. ana lang.. unya telling me, you dont have proof, etc etc. when in fact pag discuss last time, k ingon sya im sorry i wont do it again. isnt that proof enough? kakapoy oi. i dont know what to do sometimes.
i wonder kng if im doing the right thing, being too lax on him. but i also cant cut his freedom k im this lenient on him na gani, im choking him na daw?! how much more if i become more strict. sos!
nah, mao lagi sis.. kalabad jud.. ako la kaantos oi nihangyo ko na di lang sa mi communicate pra wlay gubot nah, di man sugot and nya napul an sad siguro to sya sa sige nyang ingon maski gamay na butang muingon nasuko ko maski wla na makasapot na noon.. sya dayon ng dumped! na wla lagi ulaw bagag nawng ba.. makalagot ah sus lagot ko ako noon ayo ayo hon ug away para human.. maypa buhaton ang ya giingon kay imbis la ta ngaway muingon man nasuko ta nag nag ta.. nah, di ang resulta nahuman aw di wala nay labad.. hehhee
corek. a relationship should be something that you're able to give up a little of your freedom but still in a way, you're happy and doesnt feel constricted. but i think it's much too idealistic for some people. k usual case is, people will always tend to limit the other and then the other will feel choked...
regarding your questions, i only started feeling that way when i discovered that he wasnt that faithful as i thought he was. then we talked about it and i was sort of okay for a while. but after that, i noticed it's back again to the same thing. still we talked about it. the point is i keep forgiving and trying hard to forget... for my peace of mind.
i dont get any assurance at all.. i mean he keeps telling me he loves me, but honestly telling you is not enough as actually getting some reassurance right?
like i said i dont demand to check his phone. but when he accused me of actually flirting with someone on text, i told him my phone is open for your perusal, we can even exchange numbers if you want. naturally he couldnt do that coz he's guilty im not. i said, "my phone has no lock codes, nothing" and "i text beside you so you can see, i let you know who i text...etc..."
now, if he's guilt free wouldnt he have offered the same thing, saying oh hey im tking this passcode off my phone so you can browse my phone, check it. you wont see anything there... but i never heard that from him and i never demanded for that as well, coz like i said i respect his privacy...
good reason why he does these to me? he said he did those things cz he was mad at me? im like WTF? everytime you get mad at me, am i supposed to expect that you're gonna cheat on me? The hell i know wht could be his reason, but one thing i have thought of: he's insecure. why need assurance from other women if you're not that insecure? the only thing i can think of when people cheat around is there's always assurance from the third party...an assurance that, oh hey when you're gone i wont have to worry about getting women coz i have reserves...
i dont need to investigate. i have proof.
makasapot sis, esp if e-accuse ko of cheating when im not. he has proof that i am and was not cheating, he just chooses to turn the tables on me. to veer the topic away from him i guess. kapila balik-balik. feeling nako, mas maau cguro ill do it nalng para corek nalng sya. hayz, k even if i ddint do it, naa jud sa huna2x niya na i did it. unsaon nalng.
hahhaha sis, ang puso mo.. ako na end na jud sis kaso we end bitter jud kay tungod sa iyang pasakit storya nako... lagot ko nimalos pod kog bitter ug super sakit na storya.. hehehhe na happy nako kay nka balos ko.. tama na to.. total wlay nawala nko.. bhala sya sa life nya..
aw its not that bad between me and my bf now. karon k ok kmi. only because i choose to keep quiet for the meantime. k nakabantay ko cge na jud mi away for the past few weeks, unya d ma resolve k kng naa ko point he'll turn his back to me and murag d na ma penetrate ang thoughts. pero just the other day pod, he was the first one to say sorry which was really a rare thing, esp since that day grabe jud ko ka suko as first time sa relationship cguro na on the verge na jud ko mu trantrum. believe it or not. murag bata bah. hahaha. pero grabe i was sooo mad i couldnt take it anymore. so mao to, he gave me time to calm down lang, then talked to me afterwards.. murag na ok naman for the meantime. hahayz.
awww. ichoke pd nko. hahaha. pra mg.choke2x ming duha.bitaw, ok rman na sis basta di pd sobra nga bisan igsuon or mama nitext, magselos na. ahak nlng.
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