Joke 1:

"Bad News from the Doctor"

Patient: "Yeah, Doc, what's the news?" answered Fred when his doctor called with his test results.

Doctor: "I have some bad news and some really bad news," admitted the doctor. "The bad news is that you only have twenty-four hours to live."

Patient: "Oh, my god," gasped Fred, sinking to his knees. "What could be worse news than that?"

Doctor: "I forgot to tell you this yesterday."

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Joke 2 coming soon.............