Married Buddies

Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to
the other and says, “You know, I don’t know what else to do. Whenever
I go home after we’ve been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before
get to the driveway.

I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off
before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, get undressed in the
bathroom, stick my foot in the toilet and pee down my leg to prevent
splashing sounds. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and
yells at me for staying out so late!”

His buddy looks at him and says, “Well, you’re obviously taking the
wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up
the steps, throw my shoes in the closet, jump into bed, slap her on
the ass and shout, “WHO’S HORNY”
…. and she acts like she’s asleep every time.”