
You never cease to amaze me! LOL! And yeah, take his advise...NOT! You're still my idol no matter what!
I dunno what to use for a bass guitar since I'm no bassist. But for guitar? I'd go for a DOD Death Metal or a Marshall Jackhammer as my distortion drivers. Both would make the Boss Metal Zone sound like a wet chicken. Especially the Jackhammer's versatility in tone and chunk is something to be reckoned with. For Boss pedals, I'd go for the DS-1, and of course the Dual Overdrive. Other Boss effects will do such as their chorus, delay, compressor, sustainer and what have you.
If you're opting to get a digital pedal, go for a Digitech. Or you could get a good amp with a really good and fat distortion sound such as the Line 6 Spider or the old Marshall models, VS230, VS265 & VS232.