Fireflies as hope, other gems according to Roco
First posted 01:47am (Mla time) Aug 07, 2005
By Michael Lim Ubac
Inquirer News Service
Editor's Note: Published on page A1 of the August 7, 2005 issue of the Philippine Daily Inquirer
EVEN in his lowest moments, the late Raul Roco could find it in himself to joke about his candidacy for president.
In April last year, some members of the media pack covering the campaign of his Alyansa ng Pag-Asa (Alliance of Hope) stayed with him at his rest house on Panglao Island in Bohol for a Lenten break.
Roco was then already weighing the prospects of his candidacy in light of a "chronic low back pain" that had been plaguing him for the past two weeks. But we were unaware of his anguish.
On Maundy Thursday, bored by Panglao's blue sky and white sand, three of us decided to check out the nearby Balicasag island-resort.
We made the necessary arrangements and sought Roco's permission to go.
He dissuaded us, saying that everything we expected to see there could be found in Panglao.
But noting that we were bent on going, he told us: "Do not do there what I will do."
"Like what, sir?" we asked.
"Run for president," he said.
We all
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laughed.
We had a chance to talk last June 26 at his home in La Vista, Quezon City.
Roco lay in bed in his signature floral clothes. He could no longer stand on his feet, but was at his witty, insightful best.
He asked me about the state of the country, and I said nothing had changed.
"When will this country wake up?" he said.
Noting that he was close to tears, I hurriedly changed the subject. I pointed to the flowers that adorned the corners of his library, which had been turned into his quarters.
"They look so real," I said in jest.
"Oh, they're real," he said, adding that fake flowers looked real while the real ones looked fake.
We shared a chuckle.
During that lull in the campaign in Panglao, I had the chance to study up close this man now hailed as a patriot, freedom fighter, brilliant lawyer and exemplary lawmaker.
But Roco was not his usual self at the time.
For one thing, the presidential candidate seemed like any other beach bum, dressed in loose shirt and shorts. He even went snorkeling.
For another, he was always in deep thought, which was broken only by the jokes that he cracked now and then.
He did not talk about the campaign, politics, or any of his fiery ideas to dramatically reform the country.
At one point, I consulted with Inquirer photographer Randy Hormillosa and boldly approached Roco as he sat on a monobloc chair facing the sea.
"Sir, can we take pictures?" I said, then proceeded to tell him where to pose-on a fallen log, a hammock, etc.
After the "pictorial," Roco said it was the first time in his political career that somebody told him what to do.
Embarrassed, I felt the blood rush to my head. But he patted me on the back, saying, "That's OK."
Like Christmas lights
The following week, the photograph of Roco half-lying in the hammock and looking out to sea saw print on Page 1. It accompanied my report on his then shocking decision to drop out of the campaign and seek medical treatment in the United States.
The prostate cancer that appeared to have been licked had recurred.
Much later, Roco admitted to me that he was in pain in Panglao.
But on the island the night before Maundy Thursday, while we were having dinner, Roco pointed to fireflies clustered around a tree in the front yard.
The fireflies looked like Christmas lights, and I was moved to wonder about their mystical or spiritual significance, if any.
He dashed off a series of explanations that unfortunately slipped past me as I chased after a firefly that seemed to have lost its way.
But something he said stood out: The light of the fireflies symbolized hope, like Alyansa ng Pag-Asa.
Poster boy
Roco was a poster boy for fitness until his ailment overtook him.
During the campaign, the candidate always rode ahead of everyone else, followed by the media contingent.
A month into a grueling run in the Visayas and Mindanao, some members of the media pack began skipping the early sorties to catch up on sleep.
Roco eventually noticed our absence. At one leg, he learned from his running mate Hermie Aquino that the media vans were still five or six towns away.
Later over lunch in Negros, he told us: "I already shook a thousand hands before you guys woke up."
On April 13, 2004, at the airport, as he prepared to board his flight for the United States, he endured my persistent questioning on whether he would return to resume his campaign.
"Absolutely," he said, later adding: "We will never fail the Filipino people."
True enough, on April 27, he had his spokesperson call to say that he was already in Hong Kong and would be home the next day.
Good fight
On May 10, 2004, Roco cast his vote in his native Naga City.
Asked whether he could smell victory, he said: "Let the people judge."
He would tell me later that he had fought "the good fight" and "finished the race."
He flew back to the United States for treatment on May 30. Before taking off, he told the Inquirer: "Yes. You never look back, you're always in a good fight. It's a good fight if you have the correct reasons."
Hope and honesty
On our last visit, Roco was still brimming with life and conviction but the flesh was faltering.
"Since Gomburza, our leaders have lied to us, failed us," he said shortly after issuing a call for President Macapagal-Arroyo to resign, to pave the way for "snap" elections.
"The people must decide now. Let them decide," he said.
Roco ran on a platform of hope and honesty, refusing to bank on the traditional political machinery in his quest for the presidency.
He spent nothing for the services of poll watchers, saying the people "should learn to guard their votes."
Many say this cost him his candidacy.
Die with a bang
The man is dead but his words live on:
"In politics, you never back away from people who are relying on you. They will never forgive you. If you campaign, never mind if you die with a bang, [just] not with a whimper.
"So there is no turning back now. I came home to fight on. The people need a choice. We will not fail them. We will be there."
One afternoon, in his study room, Roco told the Inquirer: "The circle, the line, never ends."
The rise or fall of every person is not ours to decide but God's to ordain, he said.
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