There are three reasons why we worry about our future happiness in heaven when we discover that our friends or family and possibly even our own spouse is not there.
1. We don’t know who God is.
We really don't know what it means that God is holy. That is so foreign to our experience, so alien to our own existence, that we have almost no grasp whatsoever about the character and the nature of God. In fact we are so baffled by God’s holiness that more often than not we are offended by it.
2. We don’t know who we are.
What we failed to grasp ourselves is the heinousness of sin. Sin is such a regular part of our experience, a part of our nature that we say “to err is human” and thus minimize our sins and unholiness.
3. We don’t know what glorification entails.
Yes, we will get new bodies and not need glasses, hearing aids, or numerous medications. But do we meditate on the fact that there will be no need for light, because the Lamb of God will illumine everything. But that which will be most conspicuously absent in that place is sin. There won’t just be a new heavens and earth, our sanctification will reach its destination. Glorification is not exaltation. It is the perfection of our sanctification...
...Until our glorification, our concerns and our sympathies rest more with wicked human beings. But not so after our glorification. Then, we will share a greater resemblance with Jesus, and thus there will be a chasm between us (together with Jesus) and unredeemed humanity. When we are glorified, our passion will be for the vindication of God’s holiness...
Because we are so Hitler-esque, we can relate to monstrous sinners more than we can relate to Jesus Christ. That’s why we find the doctrine of hell so repugnant. That’s why we feel sorry for Uzzah when he’s killed for touching the ark (2 Sam. 6), or Aaron’s sons who were struck down for playing at worship (Lev. 10). We don’t feel as sad for the slight Uzzah and Aaron’s sons imparted to the glory of God.
But the day will come when our passion and our identification with the glory of God will be so great that our sympathies will be with God and not with our fellow creatures who belittle God’s glory. We are not there now. But in our glorification we shall be.