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  1. #21

    what you are doing is very brave. it is not that easy to do that..

    i fully understand your situation i know how it feels. i have always told my mom that sometimes, helping someone even if family members, there has to be a line that needs to be drawn. sometimes, helping someone does more damage than helping perse.

    i applaud you for doing that. takes a lot of courage.

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by spartan301 View Post
    So wen yur mum txtd you for money, u caved in??
    If ya did then yur too nice... Cant blame u thou... I guess daughters are just more wired to their emotions...
    Nway, the end game of this is yul always b the bad guy...
    But nothin a fresh cup of choco cant fix

    Kind of.

    I tried to discpline my siblings. One saturday morning i told all the helpers that theyre not doing the laundry. My siblings will wash their own clothes afferall theyre not doing anything. 11 in the morning amd they were still sleeping. I was on holiday but i get up 5 in the morning. So i helped the helper to bring the laundry baskets out and my mum was at the door and asked what was i doing and i told her that as soon as my siblings get up, they eill wash their own clothes otherwise theyll be going to school on monday with dirty uniforms.

    She went berserk and grabbed the laundry basket and said " AMBI NA! AKOY MANGLABA ANA! IPA SITTING PRETTY NALANG NANG MGA KATABANG NIMO PARA KAMI NALANG ANG MAGKATABANG! MAO MAN KAHAY NAY IKALIPAY NIMO! " those were exactly her words.

    My husband witnessed the entire scene and i was just too embarrassed that i ended up crying cause all i ever wanted is o teach them to be independemt because i wont be forever there to give them a hand

  3. #23
    TS ako ra ma suggest stop sending money. teach them to at least to save money. mao ni ako pananw as I've said awhile ago mag too ang mga tao sa ato nga once naa ka sa abroad datu na ka... if you're mother can't discipline your siblings teach them to work hard to save their asses... dako na na sila so maningkamot pd na sila.. mo abot ang panahon nga maski unsa on nmo pag gam nila ikaw gihapon ang bati nga anak... maski unsa nakadako ang imong gisacrifice para nila....

  4. #24
    I'm sad to hear what you've been thru.
    I hate to say, and I'm sorry to say this... That the problem was on you. And because, the problem is on you, then the solution is also on you.
    Being generous is good, but too much generosity is not. As a song goes to say, too much love will kill you. Your problem has been rooted. How deep is its root, I'm not sure. How deep it is, is also how tough you have to make your heart is. Giving them too much is not helping them, at least you're not helping them the right way. Continuing to do what is not right is stupidity.

    Stop, and think a million times what you've gone wrong. Correct your errors slowly and gradually. It is not easy. It is a sacrifice that you have to make. Since you are going to sacrifice, let them sacrifice too. Teach them the good lesson. Don't spoil them. Let them feel and let them appreciate your goodness. Just be warned that abandoning them abruptly won't do any good either. It will just create hates and all your sacrifices will just go in vain. Stay with them and bring them back to the right track. To those that you can afford losing your whole life, kick them out of your way. If you'll do what you're suppose to do, I'm sure it will be a big happy family ever after. A happy ending!

    just my two cents

    If only Mike Holmes has to tell you, "Do It Right The First Time..."

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by carbrill View Post
    TS ako ra ma suggest stop sending money. teach them to at least to save money. mao ni ako pananw as I've said awhile ago mag too ang mga tao sa ato nga once naa ka sa abroad datu na ka... if you're mother can't discipline your siblings teach them to work hard to save their asses... dako na na sila so maningkamot pd na sila.. mo abot ang panahon nga maski unsa on nmo pag gam nila ikaw gihapon ang bati nga anak... maski unsa nakadako ang imong gisacrifice para nila....


    We used to have a helper here in sydney but i had to sack them because i feel like a pabigat with my husband after i have to send monthly financial support then magkatabang pa ko diri so i made a sacrifice that i will do the cleaning, looking after the baby after work. I dont even sleep! Para lang makapadala nila kay maikog ko sa akong bana buyboyon unya ko ug mag away me...ingnon pa lang ko, na ga maid pa me diri unya gasige pa ko padala didto but i put myself in a situation that i feel like i have no choice.

  6. #26
    mao jd ni problema sa dato maglisod ug gasto asa padong ang kwarta.
    ont:
    ts, e limit ra ang paghatag, aron makat.on sd na ginagmay sila.

  7. #27
    Quote Originally Posted by marius View Post
    let me add ... what can the institution do to help you ? What can the psychiatrist do ?? Are they really sincere ?? All they see in you is just another patient or let me just say, all they see in you is MONEY. If you want to solve this, solve it on your own, dig deep within yourself .... but if you want to surrender, just remember what i said above ... go assassinate Gwen Garcia or anyone of those politician to make a name for yourself before you die ...
    unsa man ni imoha marius ha? Martyrdom man ni... hehehe.

    by the way, TS, your only problem is that you're being too nice and you are so close to being stupid. sorry ha.

  8. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by kageron View Post
    your still breathing TS right? if so then that's good

    continue breathing as you continue to solve your problems one at a time. Commit suicide? Go to mental institution voluntarily won't even fix things. Stop running away from the problem you will only make a longer solution for it.
    I wish im not though. Even my own psychologist find it hard to remedy my problems. She even thinks that no matter what i do, someone will get hurt in the process of trying to fix things to make it right. She was too careful of the advice she was giving me because she didnt want to be held responsible if anything goes wrong

    Worst case scenario is i might loose my mum which is not new. She has tried putting herself in hunger strike if i dont give in,

    So its either i loose my mum or i loose myself. I think id choose myself because i cant blame waking up in the morning knowing ive caused her that pain that she had to end her life and having to askfor forgiveness for my siblings? Thats another thing.

    Atm... Im not sending them any financial support except for school allowances because ive just recently paid their tuition fees.
    Last edited by nitwit; 06-22-2013 at 11:40 PM.

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by marius View Post
    let me add ... what can the institution do to help you ? What can the psychiatrist do ?? Are they really sincere ?? All they see in you is just another patient or let me just say, all they see in you is MONEY. If you want to solve this, solve it on your own, dig deep within yourself .... but if you want to surrender, just remember what i said above ... go assassinate Gwen Garcia or anyone of those politician to make a name for yourself before you die ...
    Help? Their ears to listen because thats all that i need. I dont want my friends to know about it because i know they will just feel sorry for me and that i do not accept. I just dont like anyone to feel sorry for me.

    I was admitted in a mental institution for a month. They didnt even know until they rang to ask where's the money to pay for the bills, they were more worried of not receiving any money from me than me being stuck in a mental hospital.

    Im starting to loose respect of my mum. As a matter of fact, im starting to dislike her. I feel abd of saying this but this is now what i feel.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by <SMILE> View Post
    You suffered so much just because you possess that very kind heart,
    your family is so fortunate to have you, but I guess they should respond to think
    about you as well, It's a rather very noble deed, but your son needs a brighter future,
    and of course you already done enough for them to bring them into their own feet,
    everything is fine, what's needed is the realization and that affinity called kindred and consanguinity,
    but don't worry it's there always and soon it will reveal and appear.
    Thank you for your very kind words but i know it wont take long that they will disown me eventually and i couldnt care less.

    I am just way too sick of whats going on right now. My life is a mess and it will always be unless i cut them off.
    Last edited by nitwit; 06-23-2013 at 12:05 AM.

  10. #30
    Quote Originally Posted by nitwit View Post
    Kind of.

    I tried to discpline my siblings. One saturday morning i told all the helpers that theyre not doing the laundry. My siblings will wash their own clothes afferall theyre not doing anything. 11 in the morning amd they were still sleeping. I was on holiday but i get up 5 in the morning. So i helped the helper to bring the laundry baskets out and my mum was at the door and asked what was i doing and i told her that as soon as my siblings get up, they eill wash their own clothes otherwise theyll be going to school on monday with dirty uniforms.

    She went berserk and grabbed the laundry basket and said " AMBI NA! AKOY MANGLABA ANA! IPA SITTING PRETTY NALANG NANG MGA KATABANG NIMO PARA KAMI NALANG ANG MAGKATABANG! MAO MAN KAHAY NAY IKALIPAY NIMO! " those were exactly her words.

    My husband witnessed the entire scene and i was just too embarrassed that i ended up crying cause all i ever wanted is o teach them to be independemt because i wont be forever there to give them a hand
    Tough love! U gotta make up some bs bout no longer bein able to send d moohlah she wants...
    My x was in a similar pinch, so she made up some scenario dat she needs help from her fam here...
    It ended quite ok with the reversal thingy... Hope yul hav d same luck...

    Bout yur older sis - dats jst plain crazy!! Let me d married guy suck d bill!!
    If dis was my sis, id pop d knee cap on dis guy...

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