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  1. #11
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    Default Re: Wife not open to take care of my lola.


    I think murag makagaba na gyud bai, if walay muangkon og take care sa lola.
    And if your lola insists that she wants to spend the REST of her days in the old house, better let her be.
    I would feel the same towards your wife though, mura man siya og walay inahan.
    Pero sobra ra sad nga buwagan nimo, kuwang lang ka sa pasabot, labi sa part nga siya ga take care nimo sa imong younger days.
    Hasol gyud magbantay og tigulang, but trust me, they will try their best not to be a hindrance.
    Kung sulayan lang nimo, you might find it easier than expected.

  2. #12
    Elite Member s3thk's Avatar
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    Default Re: Wife not open to take care of my lola.

    dili man sad na nmo ma blame imo wife kay hasol man sad jd na...pasabta lang gd

  3. #13

    Default Re: Wife not open to take care of my lola.

    usahay ang mga asawa mutuman bya jd na sa bana kung tinarong pagka hangyo...
    pero kung nagtinarong kag hangyo unya di jud cya unya mamugos ka, hilo-i nlng na imo lola kay
    ikaw jud unta mangunay ug atiman ana kay imo na lola tabang lng ang asawa...

    ang asawa pud nga di mutabang pero dakog kaon, hilo-an sad ug apil...

  4. #14

    Default Re: Wife not open to take care of my lola.

    dili man na obligasyon sa asawa kay dili man na siya related ana... ikaw man unta or imong relatives mag-atiman ana... pde ra na nimo sila i-uban sa usa ka balay with a guarantee na naa relatives nimo mag-atiman. lahi ra bya gyud ng katabang kay dili pud na magdugay.

  5. #15

    Default Re: Wife not open to take care of my lola.

    @dedrick naka feel ko sa imo gibati bai.. permi sad ko sa ingon ani nga sitwasyon na maipit lang ta permi..
    sometimes pud ako wife feeling nako mag dinalo sa ako family wen sometimes gusto lang pud ta mo share sa ato grasya ba mao most of the time if naa ko e share sa ako family dili nalang nako ipa agi sa ako wife pra walay discussion kay taas na kaayo ang istorya if mo sulti pa ta.. with regards sa imo lola naa jud cya right na mo stay sa iya blay.. pasabta lang guro ug tarong imo asawa bai or worst case scenario mag lahi lang sa tingali imo family bsan bati kaayo paminawon kay mura ba ug g likayan imo lola na nuon...

  6. #16

    Default Re: Wife not open to take care of my lola.

    TS, mo-agree ko ni jojo_mouth. Don't put them on one roof.

    Nagdako ko nga naa sa among balay akong Lolo... so kasabot ko sa imo sitwasyon. Dili lalim ang mobantay ug tigulang... pero dili sad kabaylo-an ang kalipay nga naka-alagad ka sa mga nag-aruga nimo. Padung sad baya ta sa atong katiguwangon. Maayo na lang kung mabaslan sad ta ug maayong buot ug pag-amuma inig abot sa atong panahon.

  7. #17

    Default Re: Wife not open to take care of my lola.

    leaving your wife shudnt be one of your options TS, like others said dli mana nya prob imo lola kay sa imo mana side... if you can get a caregiver for your Lola then mao ra jud na solution sa imo prob.. dli naman cguro kinahanglan mag argue pamo sa imo asawa ana kay ikaw man nag work unless lang if daghan vices imo asawa or sakto2 rasad inyo budget... if dli pa sya kasabot ana aw pasagdi sya as if naa sya mabuhat, dba?
    dpende ra sad jud na nimo TS ug unsaon nimo pag explain sa imo wife na makasabot sya... impossible kaayo dli makasabot imo asawa...

  8. #18
    Senior Member kat5252's Avatar
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    Default Re: Wife not open to take care of my lola.

    Given the fact that our grandparents literally raised us, we'll always have the urge to return the favor once they grow older and can no longer take care of themselves bisan pag wala sila nag expect ana from us. So kasabot jud ko nimo TS if you somehow feel responsible for your Lola.
    But if you can even think of separating from ur wife because of the fact that she doesn't wanna take care of your gramma, that's just a little too much. 1st of all she's not directly related to your Lola so she doesn't feel your sympathy. Whether she wants to help or not, that's up to her and her decision shouldn't upset you even if her refusal to help out is a lil harsh on your side. Besides, her responsibility is to you and your children not your relatives.
    Regarding who has the bigger right to stay in that old house, technically imoha manang balay kay gipamana man kaha na sa imoha. When you married your wife you already gave her equal rights to that house. So it's also wrong to even think nga pahawaon nimo siya unless she agrees to move out.
    The suggestion that you get your wife another house is good but what if she doesn't wanna move out from that old house?

    I don't know what to suggest but I feel sorry for you kay naipit ka between relative and wife. I hope mapangitaan na nimo og solusyon without sacrificing your relationship w/ you wife. huna-hunaa sad imong mga anak.

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