What to do about a daughter who has been doing NOTHING since graduating from college?

[BiKho]

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dili pa lang siguro niya feel magwork...or basin nag apply² lang na xa online pah...pwo u said she is the magna cum laude material, she's smart....usually kanang mga smart type na tawo ke pilian ug work, makawork man gani na sila dili na sila gnahan magdugay ana na work, ngita napud na sila lain...
pwo murag sa iyang case kay wa sad siguro na xa na pressure pag au, okay ra guro mo financially mao wa xa magdali makawork pud....

[sui.caedere]

First, was she the one who chose her course or did you pick it out for her? She might not have the motivation to do anything because she wasn't the one who chose her life path.

Siya ra man nagpili sa iya course. I am not that kind of parent nga maoy magbuot unsa kurso sa mga anak. Kung asa sila, as long as makaya ra, den I support them.

[sui.caedere]

igo man pud koh ani....it has been 2 years pud since i graduated but within those 2 years i was in and out of a job and had 1 business....and now tambay pa jud koh....and karon la pa pud koh nang apply kay gusto kog job na nahan jud koh and kana di ra koh mo resign dayon....

umm ts since that 2 years la pa jud xa nka work bisag once? try to talk to her nicely lang and help her discover what she really wants to do....

NEVER..unless we count the time nga nagpa tutor ug math ang amo silingan for which she was paid 80 pesos per hour.

[irishe]

naa pa man gud sya manghod nga need internet so we can not be without internet connection. besides, dili na ko maka post diri ana.

ahw oo sad sah..? ahaha! pagka ogobing sad naku oi.., or how about ingnon lang nimu na dili siya pwede ka internet til nana siyay job..?

kaybaw ka TS, mao sad ni observation, daghan sad ko kauban nga in ana..

nagsalig raman gud na siya nga nagpuyo ra na siya sa inyo, then libre tanan.. mao wala jud pressure sa iya part.. kay tanan niya kinahanglan naa raman within reach rah.. libre pajud kau.. why not put some pressure sa iyaha? if that would give her the lesson, ahw do it.. ma realize rana niya madugayan..

[zrach]

Hm.. in that case, then I think she got too comfortable with the way things are and see no point in changing them... Maybe kailangan ka mu push niya harder... or stop giving her allowance hahaha

[sui.caedere]

2 YEARS?!

My real-life solutions:
1.) Go to the Gym - maka-alive-awake-enthusiastic ni siya sa tao.. I tried going to the gym everyday katong ga college pako.. grabeh. I used to sleep late kay mu duwa man pud ko pero sugod ga gym ko, murag 8pm tulog, nya grabeh ka sayo mata, mga 5am. PERO, ALIVE, AWAKE, ENTHUSIASTIC kaayo ko.. mas gana pa ko mu kaon, mas "happy" pa ko.

2.) A wise professor told me atong summer, "Being an example is the best sermon." Pero mao lagi, if dili gyud mu tagam.

3.) Cut her "addiction". Maybe addiction na cya. Dali raman mahibaw-an if addiction. Remove what she normally uses nya mu withdrawal nya cya. And that crucial moment is when you talk to her kay vulnerable naman cya ana. Pero talk in a non-threating way.

4.) Enroll her in a Master's Degree program?

5.) COMBINE ALL THESE!! XD

bitaw, TS, grabeh ra pud nang 2 years.. even for me who was a bum too after graduation. Maybe she has a relationship online or something bah.. with a guy or sa internet ba. Also, the internet can be filtered man. You can filter out the sites para the sites she visits, dili cya ka sulod.

relationships? that is probably remote. she once considered becoming a nun once. she gets mad if we joke about guys.

[twistedANGEL25]

the problem is actually getting her to be a responsible person. kay karon, she just does not care about anything.

TS,maybe when she was little,she didn't have any household chores?Kay dira gyud baya na mag start ang being responsible.

Why not let her start doing chores at home?Slowly work your way to the point where you want her to go...If you let her wash the dishes,clothes and clean the house,basin maanad na siya sige ug lihok and eventually she will look for a job.

Ako kay pabadlong sad ko sa akong parents.I didn't look for a job after I graduated from college.Mas worse pa ko sa imung daughter.I had no job,sige pa ko ug laag,uli na sa wee hours of the morning,ask them for money to buy the stuff that I want...

It came to the point where my dad finally asked me calmly what I wanted in life.Mao to,I told them that I had a slight fear when it comes to interviews.Had a bad experience one man gud.I invested in a busines with some of my friends,they were in support of what I was doing...They even gave me the capital to invest ato.But sadly,we had to stop kay nagkagubot mi sa akong mga kauban.Na abot ganing to sa korte,pero supporta gihapon sila sa ako...

Karon I realized na I should give back something...So hinay2x ko ug apply na.

[sui.caedere]

Hm.. in that case, then I think she got too comfortable with the way things are and see no point in changing them... Maybe kailangan ka mu push niya harder... or stop giving her allowance hahaha

she does not have any allowance. all she does is sleep. she does not care. kung way fud sa kusina, aw she goes back to sleep ra pud. once, she slept straight for two days!

she does not help in cleaning the house even.

[sui.caedere]

TS,maybe when she was little,she didn't have any household chores?Kay dira gyud baya na mag start ang being responsible.

Why not let her start doing chores at home?Slowly work your way to the point where you want her to go...If you let her wash the dishes,clothes and clean the house,basin maanad na siya sige ug lihok and eventually she will look for a job.

Ako kay pabadlong sad ko sa akong parents.I didn't look for a job after I graduated from college.Mas worse pa ko sa imung daughter.I had no job,sige pa ko ug laag,uli na sa wee hours of the morning,ask them for money to buy the stuff that I want...

It came to the point where my dad finally asked me calmly what I wanted in life.Mao to,I told them that I had a slight fear when it comes to interviews.Had a bad experience one man gud.I invested in a busines with some of my friends,they were in support of what I was doing...They even gave me the capital to invest ato.But sadly,we had to stop kay nagkagubot mi sa akong mga kauban.Na abot ganing to sa korte,pero supporta gihapon sila sa ako...

Karon I realized na I should give back something...So hinay2x ko ug apply na.

she has no fear like that.

it is just that she does not care about anything at all...except perhaps watching movies and anime. she does not even read a book. oh she occasionally bake kung ganahan.

[Lady-L]

how old is she now? basin spoon feeding pud kaau ka niya? bright man diay na istoryaha lang ug tarong malumanay nga pagkasulti ug mas pasultihon nimo cya para mogawas iyang pinaka tago2x dha sa iyang kasing2x lahi2x man gud utok mga bata ron and most of them feeling nila sakto cla permi, they know their rights but they don't know their obligations/responsibility. basin naa cya plano sa life nga para niya dili ninyo ikalipay but mao jud iyang gusto or love to do mao ng nag-urong nalang. ingna bahala cya unsa iyang i-pursue sa life basta kanang naay kabulohan ug dili cya mag-urong coz life will not end by playing games in computer....