Pseudo Relationship. My new problem =(

[SymphonyEtude]

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ALMOST LOVERS, BUT NOT QUITE.

The "parang kayo, pero hindi" stage. Others call it MU or mutual understanding. Pseudo-relationships. Pseudo-boyfriends. Flings. Almost like a relationship, but not quite. More than friends, less than lovers. Puwedeng may verbal agreement, puwedeng wala. One or both of you may have admitted your feelings, possible ding hindi. Walang nanligaw, walang sinagot. Pero sa kilos niyo, sa mga sinasabi niyo, parang kayo, pero hindi.

This kind of "relationship" can happen at different stages for different reasons. It can happen after a break-up. You still love each other, and you want to be with each other but you broke up for a reason. And for reasons that you alone know, ayaw niyo na muna magkabalikan.

It can also happen before a relationship, iyong pareho kayong nakikiramdam. Possible din na ayaw niyo munang mag-seryoso. Testing lang. Puwede ring hindi puwedeng maging kayo kasi isa sa inyo may ka-relasyon na. Kaya habang hindi pa siya nakikipag-break doon(sabi niya makikipag-break siya soon pero di naman niya ginagawa), wala muna kayong relasyon para nga naman hindi siya nangangaliwa kasi "hindi naman kayo."

Aminado ako na once upon a time, may mga pseudo-relationships din ako. No commitments involved…for the simplest reason that they couldn't commit, because they were either committed to someone else, or that they weren't ready to commit.

Ang maganda doon sakin eh iyong kilig feeling. Iyong merong nagtatanong kung kumusta araw ko. Iyong kapag tumunog ang cellphone, mapapangiti na ako dahil alam kong galing sa kanya ang message. Iyong tuwing binabangungot ako ay boses niya lang kelangan ko para kumalma ako. Iyong tuwing kakain ako ay pwede nia akong sabayan. Iyong pauwi na ako sa borading haws ay may hahatid sakin.

But then I learned that although it was only a pseudo-relationship, the emotions were real. And usually, in this kind of set up, the one that FALLS will hurt badly.

First, I can't ask him to commit. Since it's not really a relationship, who am I to demand diba?? Pwede ba akong magpasundo at midnight? Pwede ba siyang mag absent sa class to take care of me kasi may sakit ako? I am always uncertain about my role in his life. I cannot expect him to be always there for me. And if I feel jealous of others, I have to keep it to myslef. Sino ba ako sa buhay niya para magselos? I dont have the right to demand. :c

Next, what if you fall deeply in love with him/her? You can't be sure if he/she feels the same way. Baka nag-a-assume ka lang na mahal ka rin niya. Even if you are dying to tell him/her you love him/her, YOU CAN'T. Because you're not sure if s/he'll like it. This stage will always make you wonder anong lugar mo sa relationship niyo...or if there is a relationship at all.

Pangatlo, what if you become attached TOO MUCH? What if you have invested all your emotions and that someone hasn't? What if you remain faithful to him/her, not entertaining others, only to find out that s/he is seeing other girls or boys?

Isa pang downside ng pseudo-relationships, it is fleeting. When a disagreement sets in, or when one of you gets cold, then that would be the end of it. Unlike in a serious relationship, hindi mo alam kung saan ka lulugar sa isang pseudo-relationship. Wala kang pinanghahawakan. Kasi sa pseudo-relationship, there is no "us." Meron lang "you and me."

Buti sana kung pseudo-pain din lang ang mararanasan mo. Kaso, hindi eh. Real pain. And usually, kahit tapos na ang pseudo-relationship, hindi mo maiwasan umasang one day, may karugtong pa rin iyun. And you will be miserable, hoping to bring back what you used to have, only to find out eventually that that someone is in another pseudo-relationship with somebody else.

Pero puwede naman maiwasan ang pain eh. Puwede naman na hindi mo muna isipin ang future and just enjoy the feeling, without thinking of the consequences. that's what we call GO WITH THE FLOW.

But if you are certain that you are going to hurt yourself in the process, kailangan mo mamili. You can be happy and live the moment without worrying what would happen next. Or you can stop settling with pseudo-relationships and wait for the real thing.

Ang bottom line lang naman, kung magpapasaya sa iyo, gawin mo. Ihanda mo lang ang sarili mo sa consequence. FACE THE TRUTH or SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES? Ganun lang.

Dahil ang "parang kayo pero hindi" stage ay bihirang nagiging totoo. Usually, hanggang doon lang siya……… almost, but not quite.

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Hey guys! Remember me? I'm the guy na katong nag post ug short story about my past life sa ako ex. hahah

We are communicating a lot lately now like almost everyday. She always calls me when she has problems. I always listen to her and I'm always there for her.

She posted this short story on her wall page sa fb.
I read it. Currently mao na amo situation karon if I am correct. Akong pangutana, why is she posting this on her wall page nga makabasa man jud ko ani? Is she trying to give me a sign or something na inani amo situation ron?


I didn't tell her yet of my true feelings cause I'm afraid that I'll be stuck on the friendzone.
As far as I know, kami ra japun ang kusog ug communication lately. =/

[d`monyita]

Haaayyyy.... you again? hahahaha.

The only way for you to know is for you to just go right out and ask her. You want her? Then tell her. If she says no....then, kiddo, the FB note is NOT ABOUT YOU pala!

And you will be miserable, hoping to bring back what you used to have, only to find out eventually that that someone is in another pseudo-relationship with somebody else.

THAT should be clue enough for you kay you say you only have eyes for her and no one else so you cannot be the one who is in a psuedo-relationship with someone else right? You are NOT with her 24/7 so how are you to know that there is no other guy she is pining for? I would draw the line if I were you. Enough na ang time that she sat on that proverbial fence.

If kayo..then kayo... but if she tells you that she does not want you.... susme... MOVE ON. She ain't the only fish in the sea. Tell her that you do not want to be treated as panakip-butas-just-for-the-moment-feeling-boyfriend-kita person. So many other girls out there.

Good luck!

.

[SymphonyEtude]

^

Although I can say that he has other guys to fling with but the closest possible is me. I know her malditanesss and tamili sya ug friends. She is sociable but not nga grabeh jud. Dili man jud guro nya gi refer tanan iya pasabot sa short story sa iya gi post hehe.
But she is making a hint though that she thinks that this is "pseudo". But I am the loser for this one. The FALLEN.

When we hang out together, all of his guy friends are backing off. They knew our background already =/
She told me that she loves being single and flirty. In the end if she has problems kay sa ako ra japun muduol.
When we meet in person kay murag kami but not. When I see her with other guy friends kay dili man sila ka inana mu fling.
Her friends also said that currently ako raman daw ang ga fling sa iya. Which is confusing.

But on second thought, you give me a striking point. thanks

[apolgreyz]

sus kani sad jung mga girls sa, hilig kaayu mag pa dungog2. lols. and when you say she loves being single and flirty, i don't think those type of girls are relationship worth.

[brian joshua]

drink yakult!
yakult everyday.
everyday ok.

[azaleayve]

first and foremost, nalingaw ku sa imon first thread..heheh., a typical in love...

Anyways, You and I share common qualities, mga UMAASA sa pseudo relationship. I must admit i came from 2 consecutive pseudo kind of love..naa jud ka point and i must say, ayaw jud expect nga tungod nag post siya ana para imo na... sa mahangan lang gud.

What I did sa aku past pseudo-relationship kay murag imong binuhatan karon,being always there for her whenever your love one needs you. Sa start okay pa kaau, kaya pa ang pain and all, but later on, you will know the feeling of wanting to give up, tired, craving for the real relationship. I did came to that point and akua gikalitan siya og buhi, kadtung wala na siyay giatubang nga problem.. and you know what happened next? he let me go, pero after a while he texted me and said he missed me. Effective in such a way that he realized he is actually used to having me around... that he wants me back... But things has changed...

To sum it up, you have the power to decide if you wanted to stay or not. Salig ayaw laum.. para d ka masakitan og pag au inig kahulog nimo...

[SymphonyEtude]

first and foremost, nalingaw ku sa imon first thread..heheh., a typical in love...

Anyways, You and I share common qualities, mga UMAASA sa pseudo relationship. I must admit i came from 2 consecutive pseudo kind of love..naa jud ka point and i must say, ayaw jud expect nga tungod nag post siya ana para imo na... sa mahangan lang gud.

What I did sa aku past pseudo-relationship kay murag imong binuhatan karon,being always there for her whenever your love one needs you. Sa start okay pa kaau, kaya pa ang pain and all, but later on, you will know the feeling of wanting to give up, tired, craving for the real relationship. I did came to that point and akua gikalitan siya og buhi, kadtung wala na siyay giatubang nga problem.. and you know what happened next? he let me go, pero after a while he texted me and said he missed me. Effective in such a way that he realized he is actually used to having me around... that he wants me back... But things has changed...

To sum it up, you have the power to decide if you wanted to stay or not. Salig ayaw laum.. para d ka masakitan og pag au inig kahulog nimo...

Its your decision man sad ba?
You open my eyes to gain that power again of free will. I am a human. Not a robot. Thanks

[azaleayve]

Its your decision man sad ba?
You open my eyes to gain that power again of free will. I am a human. Not a robot. Thanks

Yeah!my decision...and honestly, i never did regret any of it.. dapat kung magdecide ka, make sure dli ka magmahay at the end

[THE KID]

u may check this thread ts
https://www.istorya.net/forums/love-i...-worth-it.html

[felmor]

mas maganda kasi pag may MU2, wag patagaling ganyan, mag usap kayo at para naman maliwanagan kayo pareho.. minsan kasi nag hihintayan kayo para gumawa hakbang ang isa't isa... kaso nauuwi sa hintayang walang kabuluhan.