sammedriano
The Exact Opposite
by , 06-01-2013 at 03:21 AM (2283 Views)
I have a bunch of questions in mind. As to the why's of my existence. I've looked for answers everywhere, yet no one has satisfied my quench for proper reasoning. I have only one question in mind. I only need one answer -Why did you leave me, Dad?
I woke up in the middle of a war. A chaotic world I never wished to be in. I was innocent, and know nothing about your personal issues -So why include me in your fights? Do you not know that I am affected too? Did I asked you to make me? Did I ever wished you to show me how painful life could be? Then, why in the world are you putting the blame on me?
I've been pushed around, over and over. You sent me to our neighbors, leaving me behind while you swing with the music in the dance hall near our place during fiestas.
You acted like you're still single, when you are in-fact not. You made me apathetic. You may have not revealed the whole story, but I knew you weren't ready when you brought me up. That's fine. I completely understand that it was because you didn't quite understand what you were doing. In fact, there are so many other young teens now doing exactly what you've done in the past. I can't do anything but worry, that sooner or later -Another me will see the earth, and be oppressed.
Most of those born like me either have to face the reality and move on, or act wildly for not being cared.
I choosed to act responsible, for I do not want you to think I am not learning.
I do not want to act worried, for I know what I am doing.
I stand on my own feet, for I know you haven't done your part well. Do not worry, I am not mad -You could have just done better.
To my dad, you said you loved me more than anything else? Please forget the lies and let's face the fact that I was the result of Mom's unwanted pregnancy. For which if during that time abortion was legal, I could have ended up in some sewer in town. Again, do not worry, I am not mad. I faced reality long time ago, and I learned the right way to survive.
To my mom, who cared for me when I was young. I am so proud of you. I could have raised my white banners long time ago, should it not be due to your diligence and love. I feel sorry what happened to you. You had suffered quite long just to make me survive. You are an adorable woman, deserving my trust. But, that doesn't mean I like the way I was brought up. You still could have done better too, but most importantly, you showed you were responsible in facing the consequence of your action. That's the most important thing of all.
I move forward, and made a pact. A promise that I'll do everything that I can to be a good father. A father whose footsteps shall be followed by my child-to-be. A father who's responsible enough to raise my child as a good citizen. I will be my dad's -Exact opposite.
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