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| "Love is..." :: stricken by love and everything that comes with it? this is your place :: |
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#1
08-13-2008, 04:15 PM
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this is my first ever post here. I've been contented lang with viewing this site but now I am in agony and if I will not let this out, this, whatever it is that I am really feeling, will cause my downfall or mental retardation! I am one who is not afraid to take challenges head on, but this has become one, if not, THE MOST difficult challenge I have ever faced. It concerns my boyfriend. We will be celebrating 3 years officially this October 13,2008. (our relationship dates waaaaay back because we lingered too long in the MU stage..which wasn't really a problem) It all sounds too good to be true.. and yes indeed it is. Our relationship has rocks as it's foundation. The world was against us. Kumbaga, Langit at Lupa ang agwat. but slowly and surely we fought each obstacle and somehow managed to hold on. He was a playboy or chickboy already long before I met him having admit that he hadn't had a relationship longer than maybe three months.. and going really lady-crazy- but he said he left this all behind as we became closer and closer until we finally decided to seal the deal. I was in my confused stage in life when I met him. I was trying to balance school, career, friends, and parents. I consider it confused because CAREER was my utmost priority... then after I met him.. it slowly became HIM as my top priority and things haven't changed since. He is my FIRST real boyfriend. I enjoyed his company the most. We spent so much time together until such time we were solely inseparable. He was there when I battled the storms of my life. Losing loved ones, family- the entire family, He was there when I lost my career. He was there when I scoured the city looking for a job until finally I found one. I got so scared when I was running out of resources, but he was there and he made me strong enough to hide my tears and wake up each day with a smile. WE moved in together April of 2006 and we've shared one roof and one bed since. It seems like it's been so long already and we used to not hide any kind of secrets from each other until recently. He got a job in a call center and now he's neglecting all the fun things we used to do. I know it's part of development but it's hurting too much na and I'm beginning to wish I'd just stop breathing so I won't feel the hurt. When you get to meet him, you'll know he's an extremely friendly guy and I know some ladies dig that.. especially the ones who crave attention. He's wronged me so many times but I don't mind forgiving him each time. We always end up making up and being friends and lovers again before nightfall.. but lately it has been different. He's been so short-tempered lately and gets angry at the silliest things. I'm supposed to be the angry b*tch in the relationship, but he's taking that away from me... When we argue, he insists that we COOL OFF or find time away from each other but I'm too scared to do that because we might break up for good and I wouldn't really now what to do without him. I did everything practical and sensible except break up with him because I don't want to. and though people may call me stupid, I'll still love him and set him free but I don't want him to wander too far away from the shore. I'm so scared that I might not be able to be brave enough to move on without him.. not because I can't but because I don't want to. This might haunt me forever. I'm a very vocal person.. I always tell him how happy I am that I am with him.. He's the last face I see before I sleep at night and his is the first one I see when I wake up every morning. I lost too many special people in my life and if I lose him, sure enough, I will have lost everything. that's why I always say the important words like "I love you" or "I miss you" because I might not get the chance to say it anymore. His arms are my refuge and my secret as to how I have remained strong all these years. His presence has become my source of air.. and its just like I can't breathe without him. Just like any concerned girlfriend, I get jealouse over lousy "textmates".. I am a typical insecure girlfriend even if he constantly reassures me that I'm his only one. Sometimes you have to mea what you say. and my gutt instincts tell me.. "Napul-an na siya nako" Maybe there is a reason behind it too. I left my "Nightlife" burried in my embarassing yesterday's chest. I don't enjoy doing what most young people do like go out and having fun with friend. I prefer to stay at home and be a homebuddy.. and just lounge around and enjoy my time with him.. but he has changed and has been demanding endless nights of drinking and other things.. that I notice he only goes home to sleep and eat.. and let his servant(me) serve him. I want to go out..but I want to go out with him...but he just won't let me! I don't have a lot of friends I can count on for trouble like this.. and he's judging me by saying I have an attitude problem that's why people don't like me. It's not like that at all. I just prefer not to be overly friendly. I'm sure there are people who are like me. I let him enjoy and have "his time" too. but he ALWAYS ALWAYS abuses it. I think he' taking me for granted. but here's the thing.. I'm willing to suffer no matter how hard it will be.. but I just want you guys to help me on how to have him always mine... I know every young man will soon look for a woman to settledown with but until that time, I don't want him to go to other women because he will just get hurt. I know how to tame him.. I know all about him.. I am certain this is just a phase... do you think things will turn out okay for me? Help guys... |
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#6
08-13-2008, 04:52 PM
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hay...grbeh...know what,i thot okay na ako...just by reading ur thread parang bumalik ung pain eh...
Been der,..dunno if u had read my thread already but 1 thing i learned from it...if he can hardly appreciate ur presence then,.. one at a time let go of the feeling..it will hurt..a lot..but holding on to someone na hindi rin nakikita effort mo is just a waste...if he cannot do it,den do it for him...sometimes,the hardest way is the only way out...I know,stupid idea but i can feel ur pain too...and i think he's really ur FIRST. But i want you to love urself too..it doesn't mean na 3years kau..siya na...you must Grow up..know wat,i had dis from a girl before..We cannot take everything in this world,hindi pwede sau lang lahat..u will need to give something too..you must let go...hear it from a broken heart...Take a step..maybe he's just aware na takot ka mawala siya kaya take ka niya for granted...Think of urself kahit papano...what if he's not ur "Mr right''??den you wud waste another year wid someone na di ka nga maalagaan...In order for you to meet the right person let go of the wrong one...wag kang matakot...it's all in the mind...trust me...If he is pushing you away,den hold on to urself...pwde siya mawala..sooner or later..If you think he's worth the pain,den it's up to you. One day ul wake up and wat u made up will turn back to you..I wish you Good luck. just PM me im willing to help you..take it from a new found friend. |
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#7
08-13-2008, 04:55 PM
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Hmmmm..... forgive me for being a bit frank, but I don't think it's love that's driving you to save your relationship. Rather, you just can't accept that you were/are in a failed relationship.
Let him go. Many fishes in the ocean. Maybe in the future, he'll clean up his act, you'll be two very different people and you'll fall in love with each other again. But for now, concentrate on yourself and let him grow on his own. Love isn't about taming your partner, you know.
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#8
08-13-2008, 04:56 PM
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why not try to have a cool off with him and take time to think and find yourself..(easily said than done, i know it is not that easy)
wag kang magpa-slave for that kind of love, women deserves to be respected and loved, we are not created to be their servant, punching bag and slaves. sometimes, guys are fond of hurting us because we allow them to do so.. as i see your situation, you gave too much of yourself to your boyfriend which should not be. kailangan di lang sa boyfriend mo umiikot ang mundo mo kc when in times like that, sino malalapitan mo? if you focused only on your bf, para kasing all your happiness depends on him. you know what, i was once in your situation but i realized na, i should have my set of friends too, have time for my family and for myself. all of us have indifferences, and if both of you are in-love with each other, you'll accept it. i married the same guy and we're happy now. a relationship is always a 50/50, a give and take process. if the other gives her 75% and the other is just 25%, d na sya balance dba? and the other one is no longer happy though the love is there. if you're truly meant with each other, let it be but in God's time! remember that we're created by God through His image and likeness, that is why every person should be treated nicely.. just don't forget to pray to God, lift everything to Him and He will guide you.. i hope this helps... God bless! |
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#10
08-13-2008, 05:02 PM
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Bitaw sakto jud. Ask lang diay ko, why man ang mga babae mugukod man sa isa lang ka lalake, naay daghan nga mga lalake nangita ug tarong nga girl, binuangan noon. Ang girl nga magtarong sad sa lalake binuangan sad. Unsa man jud na.
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#11
08-13-2008, 05:03 PM
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#12
08-13-2008, 05:04 PM
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yeah it's not dat simple...but hey she's hurting...
If you want ur guy back it's for him to decide..we cannot force him.And take it from my mom "HINDI AKO NAGPAKAHIRAP MABUNTIS NG 9 MONTHS PARA SA INYO NG TWIN MO,AT MAGSTAY SA LABOR ROOM FOR 4 HOURS PARA PASAKITAN KA LANG NG IBANG TAO" I know it's hard but if he ask for cool off den give it to him. I think he's old enaf. And pls give urself a break too..mxado kang focus sa knya. Think.Think. know what,u just need time apart.APART. If you cant fix it together then probably the best thing is fix it apart. |
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#14
08-13-2008, 05:07 PM
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#15
08-13-2008, 05:10 PM
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Correct!!! Try to to find a way na ma busy ka... maka kita pa ka lain. The best thing to do priotize your CAREER, kalingawi na lang na siya ayaw serious ana na butang. |
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HELP I want my boyfriend back!
